Wednesday, 30 November 2011

Bits and bobs...

Ash at 'Chastity Diary and Fantasy' has just started a push to get more followers and he's so keen he's promising a mammoth caption fest if enough of you sign up! Go 'here' now.

Plenty more captions to come from me today, about another seven have been scheduled for the evening. Hope you enjoy them...

Tuesday, 29 November 2011

Mistress R answers Miss Christina's questions...

Q1. Now that you are growing so much more confident in yourself as his Mistress, could you picture things going back to how they were before? I know you were always close, but could you imagine going back to him jerking off when he felt like it and not having all this control of his cock and orgasms?

MR: As things stand at the moment no, I think we're both loving it and enjoying it developing. I think we've come a long way in eight months and it just keeps getting better for both of us! However, if one of us did have concerns then we would talk it over because our relationship is more important to us than this and neither of us would be happy unless the other was 100% on board. But at the moment, it's a total win!!!


Q2. Do you think you will ever deny him for a LONG time? As in 6 weeks to a few months? I am so eagerly waiting what happens if you do that to him?

MR: Who knows, before we started this I couldn't imagine denying him for two weeks, whereas now I'm just happy to be in control and do what suits me. So you never know, watch this space. Knowing he is happy to do what pleases me gives me the option to make him wait for as long as I want.


Q3. How does it make you feel when you get him so close to cumming he is desperate beyond belief and then you just let go and know that he is there minutes longer, not being touched but struggling not to cum by mistake, and him knowing it could be weeks/months before he even gets the chance?

MR: Pretty incredible. Those moments are so intense that they make us feel really close and make me feel incredibly confident and in control.


MR: I also want to say how much I love the blog. Reading Robert's accounts of our sessions and our time together really adds to the experience, and the comments that are left are really appreciated. The blog was also very helpful in convincing me in the early days that this was genuinely what Robert wanted.

No man's land...

The eagle-eyed among you will have noticed that it's now 16 days since I was allowed to cum, which means I am in that historical no man's land between 14-20 days. So the chances of me cumming before the weekend are (at least statistically speaking) very slim. But who knows, well... Mistress R of course. Or does she?

Thanks are due...

For all the fantastic comments that have been left this past week, Miss Christina in particular has outdone herself with her commenting last night! But thanks to everyone who has left a comment on the blog, it's very rewarding and also gives me ideas and fresh insight into what other people think.
One comment in particular caught my eye this morning...

Anonymous said...
You mentioned me in tonight's writing, I was flattered sort of, fact is I have been locked since September, BUT this is a long term sentence and trust me it is NOT celibacy! I am teased EVERY DAY! Mistress gets an orgasm whenever She wants one, in fact after I posted She got one and I got to lick it all clean.
Truth is i feel like we are having sex 24 hours a day when I am like this. I have a release date early in the new year. It is possible that i will have a new perspective when i am released. Imagine what that night will be like!

First of all, I must confess, that after I commented on the original post, I did feel that I had misjudged my reply somewhat. After all, giving up control, is giving up control, so if she wants him locked for months without release then that is what can be expected. And with the benefit of hindsight I imagine this situation probably hasn't come about overnight. This comment reads to me that he is being punished for something specific, so who knows, maybe his Mistress has tried several times to dissuade some repeated transgression and this is the end result?
Of course, the other point I overlooked is that he doesn't have to be released from his chastity device to be mercilessly teased, as he has made much clearer in his second comment. That sounds like a lot more fun than what I first thought he meant...
Maybe one day Mistress R will come to the conclusion that the paddle will never stop me touching my cock without permission and decide to lock my cock up for several months without release... Gulp (let's hope not, eh!).

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Not that it probably matters to anyone else but me, but the final tally for yesterday was a mammoth 3398 pageviews!
:)

Well that's pretty conclusive so far...

Ten votes in the Ladies poll so far and well, it speaks for itself really. You're really not keen on the idea of giving back control are you ladies? When the first four votes fell in the 'Very unwilling' and 'No no no no no' categories, I actually remarked to Mistress R that I didn't think anyone would vote in the 'Forget it' category since that would imply (to me anyway) that there was no room for negotiation whatsoever and that you would rather find another partner (who was willing to give up control) than go back to how it 'used to be'.
Well, that was a mistake wasn't it since now 40% of the votes are in the 'Forget it' category!
Perhaps you didn't interpret it quite the same as I did, or perhaps you did. Why not leave me a comment (anonymously if you like) and let the readers know your thoughts?

Monday, 28 November 2011

A lovely evening...

Mmmm, another lovely orgasm for Mistress R tonight, really loved doing that, and then of course it was my turn. I wasn't feeling super-horny when we started but Mistress R got my cock surprisingly hard surprisingly quickly! So hard that she decided she wanted to ride on it for a while.... ooooh yes! She straddled me and sank straight down on my straining cock, her pussy so fucking silky and wet... it felt amazing!

"You love that I get to choose when this happens, don't you? You love that I get to decide when and if I let you inside me? You love that I have all the control and that I decide when and if you get to cum, don't you?"

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes Mistress!

She held herself still for a moment, my cock buried deep inside her. She reached back and used her nails on my balls, which I loved. I begged her to take her bra off, she told me to close my eyes and she pulled her bra down and when she told me to open them again she was teasing me by squeezing her gorgeous tits with her fingers. She rode me some more and I found myself pretty easily under control, I wasn't going to go off by accident any time soon. Then I started to wonder if she was going to let me cum inside her, and if she did, would she sit on my face and have me lick her beautiful pussy clean?

No. She got off me and knelt beside me, stroking me firm and fast for a few seconds before slowing it down and then sucking her juices off of my cock. She pushed her fingers into my mouth one by one, I could taste both of us on her skin, that was pretty hot. Then I sensed she was starting to wind it down and I could feel myself starting to get twitchy, not wanting it to end, not wanting it to stop, wanting her to jerk my cock until I came all over myself, or wherever she wanted me to.
But no, it wasn't to be. Mistress R gave my balls a few really nice slaps and then jerked me enough to keep me excited and then slowed down again, taking her hand away and then kissing me before putting it back for just a few more strokes, infuriating, but wonderful, believe me. Until finally she told me that that was my lot for today and let go of my throbbing cock for the final time.

Afterwards I asked her how she would vote in my poll. I told her that so far it's been pretty much a one-sided result. She didn't tell me which option she would vote for, but she did say that she couldn't really understand why any woman would ever want to give it up. So I guess we can draw our own conclusions from that.

I notice there was an anonymous comment left on my blog earlier from someone who is currently wearing a chastity device and hasn't been unlocked at all since September. I really couldn't be doing with that. Not cumming is one thing, no teasing is too much for me to contemplate. To me that's not chastity, that's celibacy. Still, each to their own I guess. It sounds like a pretty heavy thing he has going since his 'owner' is intending to 'mark' him. Which is something else I'm not too sure about, but hey...

Finally, today has been a new record day for the blog, I won't know the final total until midnight but it looks likely to be in excess of 3,300 hits. Unbelievable. Thanks to everyone who visited today (and every day).

An extra poll for the ladies....

I know you hate feeling left out when the poll doesn't include you, so here's an extra poll just for you. Assuming you have already taken control of your husband/slave/lover's orgasm, how willing would you be for things to go back to the way they used to be?

Fast meat tumblr...

Most of today's caption pictures (there's more on the way) have been shamelessly lifted from the delightfully named 'fast-meat tumblr' why not pay them a visit, especially if you like pics of big cocks and creamy loads... ahem. You will also find a banner in my links page for them too.

Ah, I should have considered that...

Some of you obviously have more than one chastity device... ah well, I can still work it out due to the cunning nature of my questions! Amazing how few of us don't have a chastity device of some sort, and even fewer of us have one and don't wear it. That does surprise me because I thought there would be many more like me who bought one, tried it and either couldn't get it on at all or just never persevered long enough to wear it (or who's wife/Mistress/lover didn't like the idea). Perhaps most of the people who fit that profile then got rid rather than keeping it?
Mistress 160, thanks for your comment (I do love to receive all your comments and emails, keep them coming!), for the benefit of any other people in Sol's position, you don't actually have to 'own' the chastity device yourself, if your Mistress 'owns' the device then you can still vote... but ask permission first!
:)

Sunday, 27 November 2011

Great response...

Wow, I really hit the jackpot with this poll, thanks for the massive response! 83 votes in less than 24 hours, amazing.

Chastity device poll...

Here I am struggling to think of a new poll, when it suddenly hits me that I haven't done one of the most obvious of all! Do you own a chastity device! But more than that, I want to know more detail, so please peruse the below list and select the ANSWERS (more than one) that applies to you, thanks!

A: I own a chastity device (plastic)
B: I own a chastity device (metal)
C: I own a chastity device (silicone, other)
D: I do not own a chastity device
E: I wear my chastity device 24/7
F: I wear my chastity device regularly
G: I wear my chastity device fairly often
H: I wear my chastity device rarely
I: I never wear my chastity device
J: I am on the honour system
K: I do not practice chastity of any sort

So for me, it's going to be A, I and J.
I own a CB-3000 (which I never wear) and I am on the honour system.

Sorry ladies, I promise to include you in the poll next week.

Now that's just mean...

Last night when we went to bed, I of course was hard as soon as I saw Mistress R naked. But did she grab my hard cock and pump it? No, she kissed me good night, turned over and then deliberately and repeatedly used her gorgoeus ass to grind against it. How mean is that!!!
:)

The new improved Star Sign poll...

Well, after a promising start, the poll seems to have completely failed to prove anything meaningful at all. The most likely star sign for a Dominant Female seems to be 'Scorpio', closely followed by 'Sagittarius'. On the male side it's the expected 'Taurus' and 'Libra' which take the top spots. Other than that, contrary to my first poll, the results are pretty evenly spread.
I guess we could say that a lady with a 'Water' sign is almost twice as likely to be dominant than one with an 'Earth' sign, but as far as the men go, it seems that there is almost nothing in this whatsoever ('Air' polled the most votes with 29%, 'Fire' the least with 22%).
This poll seems to totally discredit the previous one, albeit the set-up was somewhat different. Perhaps if I add the votes together....
Hmm, well, nothing massively shocking, except that almost nobody who voted in the poll is a Virgo. Perhaps then what we can draw from this is that 'Virgo' is the star-sign of the kinkless few. Or is that a bit of a stretch? Oh, no... silly me, Virgo must be where all the dominant males and submissive females are at!
I guess the most interesting thing that we can observe in this poll is the disparity between males and females with the same sign. Sagittarian males polled only 4%, while Sagittarian females polled 13%. By the same token, women with the star sign 'Gemini' polled only 4%, while males polled 10%, so perhaps we can conclude that Saggitarians might tend towards 'dominance' and 'Geminis' might tend towards 'submissiveness'. Maybe?

Back to the Literotica haters for a moment...

I know the internet is full of dicks and all that, but what gets me is the venom and spite that these people exhibit. I mean, if I've been on internet story sites and seen stuff that I didn't like, but I just move on to something else. I don't feel the need to attack the author. Moreover, it's the kind of things they write which worry me more than anything. I mean if they don't like the story fine, if they want to accuse me of being a closet-homo, well fine, I know I'm not and I'm secure enough in my sexuality to laugh it off. No, it's the underlying violent attitude to women that bothers me. It's never simply 'get some bolt croppers and cut the lock off', it's pretty much always 'get some bolt croppers and cut the lock off then use them to bash the bitches' skull in', all delivered with the righteous attitude of someone who's spent far too much time bashing the Bible and not enough time reading or understanding it (not that I've read it, but I've gotten the gist!).

Sorry but
11/20/11 By: Anonymous 

No taste for this kind of thing, male or female.
I would most likely go for slipping a date rape drug in their drinks and dropping him off at a gay bar and her at a ghetto gang bar.
No fucking little fairy cage with a gay lock is going to stop me, that's why they sell bolt cutters. 
p.s. If you note she has no love or respect for him. He is just a creature for her to abuse. 
WHY THE FUCK IS HE THERE?


Saturday, 26 November 2011

At last...

A lovely orgasm for Mistress R this afternoon. Felt so good to taste her beautiful pussy after so long (8 freakin' days!) and make her cum. Some lovely teasing for me too, though I didn't feel nearly as desperate as I did the other night. Still extremely enjoyable though! Felt kinda rusty with my tongue, 8 days is too long, Mistress R says there will be plenty of practice this week. Yes!

Friday, 25 November 2011

New video added...

Really great new video added to the video page 'Be Madeline's Cuck'.

Literotica haters attack...

Well, it's been a week since I submitted 'Thirty Seven Days' to Literotica, so I wandered over there to check the score and any comments I might have got. I clicked on my 'submissions' page, and well, 2.18 out of 5, that's my worst score by a mile and what's this.... 33 comments, surely some mistake! But no. No mistake... no mistake whatsoever!

WRONG CATEGORY!!!
This sick twisted crap needs to be in FETISH, GAY or BDSM.
This is not the place for your sick, evil fantasies. Any husband caught like that would get bolt cutters to release himself , smash her skull in and cut off her lover's cock.
Do yourself a favour and post this garbage in categories more akin to what it is.

Bizzarely, this was posted by someone calling themselves 'SlaveRowan'
There's tons more like this, but also a few like this:

I Laughed As I Posted My Score...
Knowing the loving wives critics, I anticipated the vile hated comments. There is only one style of story they like... one that ends with the bitch destroyed or dead. Story was well written and would like to see chapter two.

So, thanks to TXany.

If you want a laugh you can check out the rest here

I usually post in the BDSM category, but to me this was a pretty straightforward 'cuckolding' story, so I didn't think it really fitted in the BDSM category. Perhaps in hindsight 'Fetish' would have been a better category, but I thought that 'Loving Wives' was where the cuckolding stories went, and the person who accepted it didn't change it either so... fuck knows!

Reality vs fantasy...

I was having a conversation with someone yesterday and he asked me how 'real' my blog was, which came up after he admitted to me that his own blog was 'embellished' a little. Over the last months there has been some (understandable) confusion over my website from some people who haven't read the whole thing, so I thought I'd just write something for my newer visitors to put my cards on the table once and for all.
My blog entries are 99% 'real'. I might very occasionally gloss over something which detracts from the overall post, but on the whole I can put my hand on my heart and say that anything I have written is true and not misrepresented in any way. I completely understand why some other bloggers might want to write a certain way, to indulge their own fantasies and to entertain their readers, and I see nothing wrong with that.
However, that is not what 'I' set out to do and for some reason I feel very protective of my blog and the fact that it is 'true' and 'real'. I would imagine anyone who has read my blog from the beginning would know this, because there have been some difficult times along the way and I have reported them pretty much warts'n'all.
I think where some level of misunderstanding has crept in is through my stories and my captions, in particular some of my older stories which were written as 'extensions' of Mistress R and mine's Femdom Sessions.
The way I view it, is that my stories and my captions are for entertainment and in them I am free to explore anything I please, whereas when I am posting about myself and Mistress R, that is all 'real'. In the past I have had people read some of my stories and then comment as if these things have actually happened... of course some parts of the stories are true, but the things that were remarked upon were not. Similarly, while for the most part my captions and stories represent my own 'kinks' (to some extent), there are some which are created with others in mind.
I guess the most common misconception (and the most understandable) for the very casual reader is that I am in a chastity device. I am not. I do have one, but I am not 'locked' and Mistress R does not have the key (although this remains something I hope might happen one day). The photo at the top of the page is Mistress R, and that is a padlock key, but the image is purely aesthetic.
I don't mean to give the impression that I am saying that my blog is 'better' than other people's, I just would like people who read my blog to know which parts of my blog are 'entertainment' and which parts are real, perhaps because I would like to know that myself when I read other's blogs.

I still can't quite believe...

The number of visitors I'm getting now. I mean it's only just over two weeks since the blog racked up it's 400,000th hit, and already we are over 440,000. That's just crazy! Thanks to everyone who visits and keeps coming back for more. I am going to try and add more stuff to the blog over the next little while and continue my efforts to make it look more professional too. I am so happy with my new header, I think it looks awesome (even if I do say so myself!). Now if I can just think of a way to get my readers more involved... it's always great to get comments from you guys and it always particularly pleasing when a new name appears in the comment box. Don't forget that unlike some blogs, here you can leave your comments anonymously, or you can email me (like some of you have been doing lately, which is great) if you'd prefer.

Something's definitely changed...

Mistress R is starting to feel a little better, after a shitty week, and last night she decided it was time to tease me again. I had gone to bed about 12:30am (not tired and into my Fruity Loops!) and she followed a while later. As she got into bed I put my arm around her to give her a cuddle and she reached straight for my cock. I wasn't expecting that to be honest, but it didn't take long before I was rock hard and desperate to cum. Mistress R teased me verbally as she stroked my aching cock, until I was about ready to burst (seriously, no exaggeration).
You may remember that last time I was teased I said that it seemed different because I was finding it harder to keep control and I am pleased to say that this was the same last night. Also, any thoughts of wanting her to keep me waiting were long gone, I wanted to cum, desperately! This feels so good, like how I always imagined it would be right from the start. Of course I am so, so happy that Mistress R didn't let me cum last night, even though it must have been obvious how bad I wanted it. But that I feel is the key. In the past I've always had this niggling worry that Mistress R would give in too easily, but now she's shown me that she can handle it, even when I'm quite obviously desperate for it, and it must have been obvious. I was writhing around, pressing against any part of her I could, not to mention kissing her like I hadn't seen her for a month... it was truly fucking intense!
The whole time in my head I was thinking, she's going to let me cum, surely she's going to, I don't care if she makes me lick her fingers clean, I don't care, just please let me cum, please please please please please, I need to cum, I'll do anything, just please give me permission, please!!!
But no. Mistress R had no intention of letting me cum (and of course I am not allowed to ask!), and eventually when she decided I'd had enough she stopped touching my cock but continued kissing me, and for my part I pulled her closer and closer until my throbbing (and it really was throbbing) cock was pressed against her stomach. As ever the minutes after she stopped touching it remained intense and I was seriously, seriously worried that I was going to cum.
She told me to get some sleep and turned over. I moved against her back and felt my cock squashed against her gorgeous ass. Now I was going really insane. I knew I should let go of her but I just couldn't, even though deep down I knew I was putting myself in serious danger of cumming without permission. Gradually, slowly, the edge receded and I realised that Mistress R had fallen asleep. I extricated myself from her without waking her (no easy task!) and turned over myself, my cock finally starting to soften a little.
Something's definitely changed now, for sure. This is like a whole new level of chastity for me and it's beyond what I even thought it would be. The last two times have been so intense, like nothing I've ever experienced and I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT.
I'm sure it must be simply the knowledge that Mistress R is not going to give in too easily which has flicked a switch in my brain and taken me to a whole new level of experience. I guess in the past I have subconsciously been holding myself back, worried that if I show too much how bad I want it she will pick up on it, but now that I am satisfied that Mistress R can keep her head (even when I'm losing mine!) I feel like I am really opening myself up to the whole experience instead of just some of it.
I can't tell you how wonderful this feels. It's the most amazing feeling I ever had. We've had a shitty week, and this just made me feel like a million dollars all over again. I love Mistress R so much, I just want her to feel better now, I want to make her cum and hold her and tell her how much I love her. She really is amazing. I feel like the luckiest guy alive right now.

Thursday, 24 November 2011

So, it's eleven days now...

My last orgasm was on the 12th of November and Mistress R's was last weekend. Poor Mistress R has not been feeling at all well this week, and I am also wondering if I am going down with her cold too. Last night Mistress pondered if I would have some confessions to make since she hasn't even touched my cock since the weekend, but she didn't ask me outright. I'm assuming she's waiting until she feels up to using the paddle! And yes, I do have two infractions to report.... oh dear.
On the upside Mistress R is hinting that pussy worship might be back on the agenda by tomorrow night, I guess I'll just have to keep my fingers crossed and hope that I don't end up feeling like crap just as she's feeling better.

New look...

Due to my policy of continuous improvement (!) I have created a new look for the blog. Well, it's really just a new header and a new pic for the 'Femdom Sessions' link, but I think it makes quite a difference. Hope you all like it.

Wednesday, 23 November 2011

Blimey, unexpected chastity device sighting...

Just in the middle of watching more trash TV, and waddya know, episode three of Showtime's 'Gigolos' sees one of the guys (Jimmy) summoned to a ladies house who has him wear a chastity device and then gives him a few slaps with a 'pig slapper' (whatever that is). Really unusual to see a CB in the mainstream like that, he didn't look like he enjoyed it much, I couldn't help wondering when she was gonna break out the strap-on... wonder how much he'd charge for that!!!

Jimmy


Okaaaay, so part two... I didn't realise he was gonna keep it on. Which makes me slightly dubious about the whole thing really... (yeah, cos up until now I was totally buying that this show was 100% genuine - not!) since we all know how difficult it is to get used to wearing a CB. So anyway, he goes back to see his client the next day, still locked, and she ball-gags him and slaps his ass with the 'pig slapper' again (pretty soft by the look of things). Kinda weird seeing this on TV! Of course there's the ritual humiliation for Jimmy of admitting to his gigolo buds that he's wearing (whisper it) a 'cock cage'.


In part three Jimmy returns to his client and is finally allowed out of the cage, hmmm. Three days straight off the bat, really? Fortunately for him he's shaved (hahaha).

Silly, bollocks, but entertaining and quite funny all the same.

New header...

I'm pretty chuffed with it, sadly you can't actually tell that the black background started life as a photo of some leather, but never mind.... Mistress R's feet are the most important bit!

Nothing happening at the moment I'm afraid. Mistress R has her period and she's got a horrible cold so she's really not in the mood for teasing me. Oh well, hopefully things will be back to normal by the weekend. C'est la vie.

New story...

I have been asked by a reader to write a story for them. I have never done that before, and was wary after my experience trying to write for Femdom Cave, but he has submitted an idea and I like it so I am going to do it. I am sure it will appeal to many of you since it features several themes that are quite common in this community so of course I will be posting it here and also on Literotica. If anyone else wants a story written then please email me.
I'm not promising anything, because if the ideas don't appeal to me then they probably wouldn't turn out that well and it will be a waste of everyone's time, but I am quite happy to hear suggestions. Also please bear in mind that I don't have unlimited time, so I might not get straight on it....

Hmm, well...

The poll isn't seemingly producing the conclusive results I expected.... in fact, it seems to be going against my expectations if anything. I thought that if you guys voted for your ladies you might skew the poll because you would be voting for ladies who wouldn't really consider themselves 'dominant', however, despite this, the ladies poll continues to produce (something more like) the expected result, with 68% of the votes cast in the expected places.
However, the mens poll isn't nearly as conclusive, with only 54% of the votes falling into the expected places. However, once again Libra and Taurus are stealing the lions share of the votes, just like last time...

A new(ish) blog...

Contrary to popular belief, I don't get that many emails from people about the blog, and I like getting them. So when I got one yesterday from someone telling me how much he loved my blog (flattery will get you everywhere) and asking if I would look at his blog, I was quite happy to do so. When I opened his page I saw that he had had something like 150 page-views in three months. My first advice to him was to submit his blog to 'Keyheld', which he did, and low and behold, in one day his total has tripled. If you have a chastity-themed blog and you want more visitors, I cannot stress highly enough that the very best thing you can do is to submit your blog to appear on 'Keyheld', my blog visits increased massively when I was added there (which is why the only banner on my main page is for their site!).
But since I don't get all my traffic from 'Keyheld' and since the blogger in question made the effort to contacty me and asked very nicely, I thought I would give his blog a plug here, I've also added it to my blog-roll (at the foot of the page) and I will be adding a banner to my link page too. Go visit and make his day.

http://chastitydiaryandfantasy.blogspot.com/

Tuesday, 22 November 2011

Mistress R answers Kate's question...

On Friday, Kate left this question for Mistress R.
"I am interested to know if she thinks being in chastity has changed you and her and if so, how?"
Thanks for your question Kate. I think it has changed us somewhat, I think it has brought us even closer (we were already and have always been extremely close) and it has made Robert even more attentive towards me than he already was. I know 'chastity' is held up as some 'fix-all' for marriages, and maybe it is, but our marriage was very good anyway, so all it's really done is added a little cream on top.
At first I was a bit unsure about it (very unsure even) but as time has gone on and I've realised that this is what Robert wants I have become more relaxed about it and have found that my confidence has increased. It's hard at first to be the one 'in control' and having sex of any kind without letting your husband cum is weird to begin with, but once you get used to it you start to enjoy the power and the way he reacts when you touch him and tease him.
I like the fact that it has taken the pressure off both of us. When one person is in control it's a lot easier because this way I get to do what I want, when I want. Robert is always eager to please me when I want him to and that feeds more confidence back to me. As far as Robert goes, being in denial means that he is constantly horny and as such his cock is always hard when I want it to be. It wasn't always like that, so this is better for both of us!
This is also very empowering and gives me the confidence to initiate whatever I want, whenever I want! And because he is always eager to be touched, you will find a denied man is always ready when you are (if only all those sports-widows knew the secret...) and because you only have sex or intimacy when you are in the mood for it you will find that you enjoy it more and because he is denied he will enjoy it more too. So everyone wins.
I would also say, as far as your husband being allowed to ask for penetration, I would strongly recommend that you convince him that he should surrender that right. I don't really know why I came up with that rule (in addition to the 'not being allowed to ask for an orgasm' rule) but it was a very good idea and one I would recommend to anyone in my position. Since it's supposed to be about me (and you) and what we want, if you want him inside you then you will initiate that, otherwise the pressure remains to do it.
Of course men 'think' they know what we want, but they don't. Your husband may be surprised at how little penetration you actually desire (or maybe not, depends on how much you want I guess) and this may cause some short term problems, but hopefully if he genuinely craves your control then he will get used to it and come to accept it. He will most likely also come to appreciate it all the more if it happens less often, I know that is how Robert feels about it. He tells me that every second inside me feels amazing, what more could a woman want to hear?
I hope this answers your question Kate and good luck with your adventures.
Mistress R.

Monday, 21 November 2011

More Dom's than subs...

Well, this is interesting, the sub star signs are evening out, yet the Dom females still 75% in the expected zone.

The voting so far...

Well, so far the voting is pretty much following the expected pattern with 66% of the sub-males falling into the expected pattern, but even more astonishing is that 85% of the dom-women are falling into their expected star signs!

85%!

Trash TV...

Mistress R and I are suckers for trash TV: Bridezillas, Tough Love, Four Weddings and best of the lot Tool Academy (USA - the UK one is awful). Watching the closing stages of season two the other night Mistress R suggested that the 'Tools' should try chastity and see if that didn't curb their 'toolness'. Watching things like that (I know it's just TV, but still) it amazes me what some people are prepared to put up with from their partners. If only they would lock CB6000's on the lot of them right at the start it would be interesting to see how quickly they sorted themselves out!

Ha ha ha...

I thought I'd just have a look at what star signs were considered compatible and whether they fell into my dom/sub pattern, I didn't get very far since the first one I looked at was Aries (Mistress R) and apparently she should never, ever go out with a Libra like me..
In fact it seems Aries are best suited to other 'fire' signs, which means Dom's dating Domme's. That's not going to work, is it?

Look at that...

Straight off the bat the votes are falling as expected, unbelievable!

New poll...

For my next poll I have decided that I would like to try repeating an earlier poll. The reasons for this are twofold,  firstly as I now have many more visitors every week there should hopefully be a bigger sample, and secondly because the results of the poll the first time were so staggering that I want to see if the results are repeated. Also I want to split the poll into men and women so that I can see if the expected division in voting appears.

Incidentally I don't usually like to encourage this, but since there are likely more men that women reading this, if you know your partner's birthday/star sign (see list below) AND YOU CONSIDER HER TO BE AT LEAST MILDLY DOMINANT, then please vote for her if she doesn't visit the site herself. I am assuming that if you (men) are reading this then you consider yourself at least mildly submissive.

STAR SIGNS:
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Libra (September 23 - October 22)
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
Aquarius (January 20 - February 19)
Pisces (February 20 - March 20)

I still don't really believe in all this stuff, even though I am a textbook 'Libra' and Mistress R fits the 'Aries' profile too... but the results of the last poll were extremely hard to ignore!

Results of the poll...

Well, once again thanks to everyone who voted in this weeks polls, it's certainly made for an interesting result.
On the one hand, 25% of women who voted admit to masturbating daily, whereas only 14% of men who voted agreed. Also 50% of men reckoned that their partner masturbated once a week or less, whereas only 31% of women agreed. These figures don't look too out of whack until you consider that 20% of men admitted they had no idea (including me), which means that if we adjust the percentages for those who didn't know that means that in the first example the men's score rises to 18%, which is closer to the figure given by the ladies, but by the same token the figure for men who believe their partner masturbates once a week or less rises to a whopping (and possibly whoppingly misguided) 63%, more than double the figure given by women.
Of course, all these figures could be 100% accurate, because we don't know who's voting. It would be very interesting to see this poll repeated using 100 couples, but I don't really have the means to do that. But what we can say is that of the ladies who voted in my poll, 69% said they masturbated at least 2-3 times a week, yet only 30% of the men who voted agreed.

Sunday, 20 November 2011

A little bit of statistical analysis...

Currently, Mistress R has had 75 orgasms to my 16 (since April 2011). That's a ratio of 4.6875, which is edging closer and closer to 5-1, which I personally think is the least that it should ever be.

Now looking at the frequency of my orgams:
The shortest I have had to wait was 6 days (twice)
The longest time was 28 days (once).
The most common amount of time I have had to wait is 14 days (three times).
I have waited 20 days or more five times.
I have waited fourteen days or less eleven times.
I have never waited between 14 and 20 days.
44% of the time I have had to wait between 11 and 14 days.
31% of the time I have had to wait more than twenty days.
25% of the time I have had to wait less than 11 days.

The answer...

To Kate's question may not come today after all, sorry... maybe tomorrow.

Saturday, 19 November 2011

Well, a lot more votes in the poll...

And still the ladies most popular vote is 'Every day', while the guys maintain their partners masturbate 'rarely'.

Femdom cave book update...

Hmm, well I got some good feedback from Femdom Cave about my book, and an offer was made to help me with it if I would agree to start serialising the book straight away. I wasn't really happy to do that since I am aware that I could end up losing interest or just not being able to complete the book, so in the end FDC decided they didn't have the time to help me with it. Which is fair enough, since they don't want to waste time on something with no guarantee of a book at the end of it. But this does mean that I'm kind of back to square one, well not square one exactly since I've already got 24,000 words written, and FDC are still interested in the finished book and they did give me a few hints as to what needs to be done. I don't really know what I'm going to do now. Part of me is inclined to just forget it, but it seems such a waste. The only problem is there's a LOT of work to do to get it to a finished state and it isn't easy to write because it was written in a particular way for FDC.
Well, I don't know what to do with the bloody thing to be honest. I really don't have enough spare time to do anything with it at the moment.

Friday, 18 November 2011

Mistress R hits 75...

Another lovely orgasm for Mistress R tonight, and some lovely super-hot teasing for me too. Mistress is very pleased with me because I haven't touched my cock without permission since I came last weekend, so pleased in fact that she decided to reward me by riding my cock for a couple of minutes, which was lovely.

That's it for now, but just to say thanks to Kate for her question, Mistress R will answer it over the weekend.

Mistress R sez...

I showed yesterdays post to Mistress R and she said, although she never really gave much thought to it beforehand, not allowing me to ask permission to cum was a great move on her part. She also very strongly agreed with me that if you genuinely want someone else to have control of your orgasms then why do you need to be able to ask? If she wants to hear you beg, then she can easily tell you that's what she wants, but as a general rule - no asking, no begging.
Of course Mistress R decided that I wasn't allowed to ask for penetration either, which may not suit everyone. I guess it depends how serious you are about giving up control and how far you want to go with it, which is for you to negotiate when you start out I guess...

Thursday, 17 November 2011

A few little tweaks...

Just made a few little tweaks to yesterday's story, nothing major, just a couple of things that didn't seem quite right. Probably won't even be noticed...

The wrath of 'Q'...

Q said...
My-my! Am I detecting an unfulfilled need here? After reading the recent postings on forced cock sucking by both you and k, I may have to reconsider this activity, and start formulating a plan of my own! lol!!!

Lawks, glad I'm not 'k', well, kind of... hahaha.

But yes, I must confess I have in recent days, posted several captions on this subject and written a story about it too... it remains an immensely confusing fantasy to me, since I am not remotely attracted to men. It would be a cop-out for me to say that it's entirely about the element of control by the woman in these scenarios, but that is the essential part without which the fantasy does not work for me.
I think this is something that I've been over several times before, and I'm no nearer understanding it now. I guess it's mostly submission, partly humiliation and a little bit of curiosity (I'm sure if we are truly honest a lot of us must occassionally wonder what it's like to be a woman and to feel a cock cum in our mouth, or is it just me.... and 'k', hahaha.)
I guess I can see why some men really go for 'ladyboys', the idea of a really hot woman with a 'cock' certainly has it's merits, though I don't think I've yet seen a ladyboy who was convincing enough for me... 

Wow, I'm still in awe...

Last night's teasing really was something else... I am so impressed with how Mistress R has taken to this and continues to progress. I am even more impressed that she didn't weaken even though it must have been fairly apparent that I really wanted to cum. In fact I must say that right from the start Mistress R has been extremely good about taking me at my word, which is something that (from reading other blogs) a lot of women do struggle with. Then again, perhaps that's where Mistress R was supersmart in having me agree that I wasn't allowed to ask/beg to cum, it must be a lot easier to keep your resolve if you don't have to deal with that, and it has the added bonus of making your partner feel even more submissive and frustrated. I think if I was allowed to beg to cum, then last night I would have. I still can't believe how intense it was after only a few days, it's never felt like that so soon after an orgasm before...
In fact I would go so far as to suggest that if you are one of those people who's partner's do tend to give in once you start begging and pleading for release (even though deep down you don't want them to) then might I suggest agreeing that you are not allowed to ask? There could be some previously agreed 'punishment' if you are that way inclined, or it could just be that she stops touching your cock, that should keep your mouth shut!
Of course you don't have to do this forever, maybe you could do it as a temporary measure until she gains the necessary confidence. Or then again, maybe she will decide that it's something she would like permanently. And if you can't accept that, then actually who are you kidding that you want her to have control? It's all about her, remember!
Mmm, I can't wait for my next teasing session, I hope this period of denial is the longest and hardest yet!

Wednesday, 16 November 2011

Mmmmmmm, amazing...

Prior to our femdom session, Mistress Christina left a post saying that she hoped Mistress R would deny me and leave me so hard that it took ages to go down. As it turned out, Mistress R made me cum very hard indeed (even though she didn't let me tongue her ass), but tonight... not so much.
After some very hot kissing and teasing she pushed me down between her legs and I brought her to another lovely orgasm with my tongue. Again I wasn't expecting too much since she'd teased me before I'd gone down on her, but she was eager to continue and soon had me rock hard. Considering I was allowed to cum on Sunday, my level of frustration was unusually high, for what is, like... three days! 
Mistress R slapped, sucked, stroked and clawed at my cock for quite a while until I was literally pumping my hips hoping that she would let me cum, but no, she remained unmoved (it's times like this when you realise how difficult it is not even being allowed to beg to be allowed to cum) and eventually stopped touching my throbbing cock.
As I have said on here before, the minute or so after she lets go is so intense, and I was still breathing really hard, hoping that she might change her mind and finish me off, or at least stroke me a little more... but no. Instead she said 'That's all the teasing you're getting for the moment'. 
Which in a way kind of relieved the pressure, but at the same time it still took several minutes before my cock started to soften. All I can say is that it was absolutely amazing, and I can't wait to do it again! I am so lucky to have my Mistress, and I cannot believe how her teasing is progressing. I am so, so happy tonight.

Thirty Seven Days (written November 2011)

The darkness was almost claustrophobic. Kneeling here for what seemed like forever had taken it’s toll and I was aching to stand up, to stretch out and most of all, relax! But there was no relaxation on the cards for me tonight, that much I knew. Mistress had left me here all evening, my hands tied behind my back, my cock still locked in it’s cage, just like it had been for the last thirty-seven days…

Earlier Mistress had laid back on the bed and had me eat her pussy to a violent orgasm, it was a sure sign that something evil was playing on her mind, she always comes that much harder when she’s planning to be especially wicked, and this was a real sheet-ripper. I had no idea what was about to transpire, but Mistress was plainly beside herself just thinking about what she was about to do.

She blindfolded me and told me to kneel on the carpet at the foot of the bed, then cuffed my wrists behind my back. Then she knelt down beside me and gave me a long, luxurious kiss, tasting her sweet juices on my tongue as she reached down and squeezed my swollen balls. She pulled away then, but continued to fondle and scratch at my aching nuts.

“Maybe tonight you’ll get a chance to cum,” she said, almost giggling as she spoke. “You must be so desperate now, I bet you’d do almost anything…”

Now I was really worried. She lifted her right hand to her neck and closed her fingers around the key to my chastity belt, before lifting it to my lips.

“Kiss your key for me,” she whispered.

I obeyed, hoping and praying that she would take that key and finally unlock my cock and allow me the orgasm I needed so badly. But it was not to be. She stood up and walked away from me without a word, turning the light out as she left the room and then the house.

---

I don’t know for sure how long she left me, but it must have been at least an hour, probably much longer. I heard the car first, then the footsteps, then the key in the door. She was back! The relief was palpable.

I heard her walking about the house, her high heels clicking on the laminate flooring in the kitchen. But there was another sound, a heavier, duller sound that accompanied her, and I slowly began to realise that she was not alone.

My heart sank, it wasn’t the first time she had cuckolded me, and it wouldn’t be the last. But I knew that once she started fucking this guy, any thoughts of me would be forgotten, at best I would have to wait another hour or more and then she would come back to me with a well fucked pussy full of cum she wanted me to clean for her.

But today was different. A lot different…

The footsteps sounded like they were coming closer and then I heard the handle on the bedroom door. The door creaked slightly as it opened, I had never noticed that before, but in the darkness I guess my hearing had become more acute. I smelt my Mistress as she wafted in through the open door and settled herself on the end of the bed. Then I felt the floor boards moving slightly as the other person entered the room. He moved a lot of air, he must be quite a size.

Mistress giggled and then groaned as I heard them kiss and his hands sliding over her stocking clad thighs, his rough skin snagging them slightly. It sounded like Mistress was all ready to go, but she’d never fucked any of her lovers in the same room as me, why was she doing this now? And what about him, it was dark, but surely he can’t have failed to notice the blindfolded man kneeling at the foot of the bed?

I heard Mistress tell her companion to lie down and the next thing I heard was her tugging at his belt buckle. An empty metallic sound followed as she pushed back the belt and it rattled against itself. Then she pulled down his zip and eased open his jeans, pushing them down his legs and stroking his hardening cock through his boxer shorts.

She lay down next to him then, kissing him noisily as she squeezed and massaged his cock until it was rock hard. Not long now, I thought. Soon she’ll be mounting him, forcing her pussy down onto his throbbing dick and milking every last drop out of his balls. Then he’ll leave us alone and she’ll drag me onto the bed, forcing me down between her legs to make me worship her cum filled cunt until she explodes in ecstasy.

As usual my mind was full of conflicting emotions. The thought of her with another man infuriated me, but the thought of her expressing her dominance over me like this was intoxicating at the same time. As she never hesitated to remind me, it was all my fault. It was I who had instigated the whole Femdom thing, it was I who had put these fantasies into her head, it was I who had allowed her to push and push until the transfer of sexual dominance was complete. In other words, I had made my own bed and now she was going to fuck someone else in it!

Despite my frustration and anger I felt my cock hardening inside the chastity cage until the 'points of intrigue' bit into my turgid flesh. I winced loudly and Mistress groaned in response, sliding down her lover’s body and peeling away the black cotton of his underwear to reveal his long, thick stalk. She licked her lips as she breathed in the musk of his scent and then opened her mouth wide to allow the bulbous head of his cock inside.

I could not see any of this of course, but the lewd sucking sounds (exaggerated for my benefit no doubt) told me all I needed to know about exactly what was going on just a few feet away from me.

Despite the pain of the spikes digging into me, my cock refused to soften and continued to try to grow inside the tube until it pulled my balls forward. I was breathing hard by now, trying to ignore the discomfort that my Mistress’s evil behaviour was having on me.

I heard more rustling as Mistress pushed her friend’s jeans and underwear down around his ankles to the floor. Then she started sucking his cock in earnest. He groaned loudly and urged to suck him deeper into her throat. Mistress moaned loudly and I could hear her gagging slightly as she did her best to swallow his entire length, something I knew she would never, ever do for me.

Then, suddenly I felt her move off the bed and flick on the light. My blindfold was still in place but now a small volume of light seeped in around the edges, if Mistress’s lover didn’t realise I was here before he would certainly know now. He chuckled softly to himself, but said nothing and Mistress moved behind me to release my wrists.

“Your poor cock is so swollen in there, it must be so frustrating,” she said, with barely concealed delight.

“Yes Mistress,” I breathed helplessly.

“Well, maybe I will let you out soon,” she sighed. “Just be... patient.”

She kissed me then, and I could taste his cock on her lips. At once it disgusted me and made my cock throb still harder, causing the back-ring of my chastity device to stretch my balls even further forward. Then she reached down and clawed my balls with her long nails, moaning into my mouth as she felt me trembling, trying to cope with the multitude of conflicting emotions and physical discomfort she was inflicting on me.

After a final hard squeeze to my balls she moved away back to the bed and I heard her start kissing her lover once again. It felt good to be able to move my arms again but I knew that I must remain still and not disappoint my Mistress. I placed my hands at my sides and mentally tried to will my cock to soften, wondering just how much more of this I could stand.

More sucking and licking noises then as Mistress straddled her lover and they began an intense sixty-nine, both of them breathing heavily and moaning into the other's groin as they pleasured each other orally. Then Mistress switched around and sank herself down onto her lover’s engorged cock. They both moaned loudly as she felt him stretching her soaking wet pussy to the max and he fought to keep control, not wanting this to end too soon.

She sat there for a few moments as they composed themselves, allowing each other to calm down a little before she started to ride his thick, hard meat. Now he was relaxed, his cock firm and strong as she started to glide up and down, squeezing his cock firmly with her strong pelvic muscles. She angled herself forward slightly and sighed blissfully as her clit started to rub against the heavily veined top-side of his cock.

“Don’t cum,” she gasped as she rode him faster and faster, grinding her aching clit against him until she felt herself spasming hard, almost forcing him over the edge with her.

She collapsed onto her hands then and sank down to kiss him, his cock still rock hard inside her sodden cunt. The fact she was kissing him so passionately with his cock still inside her made me feel sick with jealousy, but my cock still continued to throb as hard as it could manage inside the chastity device.

She reached down and slid his cock out of her and then moved so that she was laying across the bed facing me, her face just inches from his wet, throbbing cock.

"Take your blindfold off," she said in an blissfully exhausted voice.

It took me a second or two to register what she had said and then I slowly reached up and peeled the blindfold away from my eyes. Having been in the dark for so long it took a little while for my eyes to adjust and in the meantime I felt myself squinting as I watched Mistress gently stroking her lover's cock. It was bigger than I'd anticipated and considerably larger than my own cock.

As my eyes adjusted to the light I focussed on Mistress's beautiful face, she looked so amazing, still flushed from her orgasm, her mouth just inches from her lover's throbbing prick. Slowly she moved forward and closed her lips around his cock-head, her tongue flicking around the corona, tasting the deep reaches of her pussy and closing her eyes in ecstasy as she thought about what she was about to do.

It was only then that I noticed her necklace was missing, the necklace from which my key was always suspended. Where had it gone? Had she lost it? Please don't let her have lost it! Maybe she had left it somewhere on purpose? Or... no, she wouldn't have given it to her lover, surely? The thought made me almost panic, but then I saw it.

While I had been blindfolded Mistress had taken her necklace off, doubled it and then hung it over her lover's cock so that it hung down beneath his large, heavy looking balls. My jaw dropped open and Mistress forced her mouth down harder onto her lover's throbbing cock, bringing a loud grunt of pleasure from his throat. I could only see his lower half, since Mistress's body was shielding the rest of him from view, but I knew he must be getting close to cumming by now.

Mistress lifted her head up and looked me straight in the eye, licking her lips and narrowing her eyes as she enjoyed the taste of her own juices and his meaty cock. She stared at me for a few moments, wondering if I'd noticed her necklace, and the significance of it's position.

"Come closer," she breathed. "I want you to watch this."

I shuffled closer, my knees aching like hell now.

"Watch," she said as leant forward again and ran her tongue up and down the length of his cock, stopping briefly to suck his balls, which again brought another soft groan from the anonymous guy laying on my bed.

"I want you to suck him," she whispered.

I shook my head and pulled back slightly, but she persisted, looking slightly annoyed at my disobedience.

"I know how hard your cock is in that cage," she said. "I know how badly you need to cum, but for you to get what you want, first I want to get what I want. And I want to see you suck his cock... for me."

I glanced at the key swaying back and forth between her lover's legs and swallowed hard. I had fantasized about this of course, about her making me do this for her, since I knew that was the only way I'd ever be able to justify it to myself. But now that it was happening for real, it seemed, well... real!

"Do it for me," she whispered. "I want to see you do it, I want you to suck his big, hard cock for me and prove how much you worship me by swallowing his load... I know deep down you want to do it for me, don't you?"

I felt my head nod almost imperceptibly, even as my mouth opened and I almost silently mouthed the words 'I can't'.

Mistress looked disappointed and began sucking his cock once again, her eyes never leaving mine as she searched for some sign that I would change my mind, but she saw nothing and after a few minutes she looked away and began pumping her lover's cock hard with her fist, her lips just over the tip of his stalk.

I knew it was too late now, she was going to make him cum and I was not going to be allowed out of my cage, and that was probably only the start. I had failed her, miserably. And no doubt she would take great delight in punishing me for it over the coming weeks. Perhaps that had been her plan all along? Perhaps she knew all along that I would never be able to do as she asked, maybe that had been why she hadn't forced the issue or threatened me, perhaps she wanted me to fail...

Suddenly I realised that Mistress's lover was cumming, her hand pumped furiously and he groaned loudly as his hips pumped his cock towards her waiting mouth, spewing his hot, creamy load into her cheeks. It seemed to go on and on, as if Mistress was determined to drain every last morsel of spunk out of him, but eventually she stopped pumping and allowed his slowly softening cock to fall from her mouth.

She turned to me and beckoned me to come closer. I slid towards her nervously, half realising what she was about to do. She leaned forward and down to kiss me, and as I opened my mouth I felt her force his thick cum into my mouth with her tongue. I started to pull away, but Mistress gripped the back of my head and held me there as she swirled her tongue in my mouth. Despite myself, I felt my cock begin to leak pre-cum into the cage, and winced as the spikes dug even deeper into my aching flesh.

"Swallow it," she said, daring me to disobey her again.

I swallowed the mouthful of her lover's cum, trying not to show my distaste for what she had instructed me to do. She smiled and reached down to rub the tip of her finger along the slit in the front of my chastity cage, gathering the pre-cum I had leaked and then lifting her finger to smear it on my lips.

"I knew you wouldn't have the strength to do it," she crowed, her breath warm on my face. "But you will... because that cage is staying on until you do."

PRE-REVIEW: The Anal Invader...




I must have had this toy for six weeks now and I haven't tried it and I don't know when I will try it. The problem is, honestly, that living this lifestyle it's just not up to me when I can try out these things, which isn't fair on the company that have sent me it. So, what I am going to do is this, I am going to write about it here, with you understanding that I haven't actually used it yet, and when Mistress R does decide that I can use it, I will review it again properly.
This toy comes from Eden Fantasys as usual, who have a wide range of sex toys available including plenty of anal toys. It is surprisingly chunky actually, and when I placed it next to my own butt plug (the one that Mistress R rather clumsily over enthusiastically rammed up my backside the other week) I was slightly alarmed to see that it was even wider. This perhaps has slightly dented my desire to try and persuade Mistress R to let me try it out. Still, that's not a very plausible excuse, since because of the design it should stay in at each 'step', so it would be a good toy for anal training and gradually stretching the wearer's hole.
One good thing I will say about this toy is that I like how short it is, although perhaps that adds to the impression of girth and makes it look scarier than it really is.
The cage looks a bit gimmicky and possibly a bit large (surely not!) but then having read the review on the Eden Fantasys website it seems that it is slightly deceiving, since the reviewer found that once it was on he found it a lot tighter than expected. He also said that he found it made it incredibly difficult to cum even when his girlfriend rode him hard, which is very interesting indeed for people like us!
Hmm, I really want to try this out now, perhaps I will try and persuade Mistress R tonight. If so I will report back to you tomorrow with a proper review, or if not at some point (hopefully not too distant) in the future.

In the meantime, why not check out Eden Fantasys for all your sex toy needs.

New captions...

I hope you guys are enjoying the captions, sometimes in the past I have felt guilty of perhaps 'quantity over quality', but I think at the moment I'm on a bit of a roll, so I'm going to keep whacking them out while the creative juices are bubbling...

Interesting...

So far twenty ladies have voted in my poll (thank you, I didn't know I had twenty lady readers!) and so far pretty much a third masturbate every day, a quarter a couple of times a week and a quarter rarely.

By contrast, half of my male voters reckon their partners masturbate 'rarely'.

Now I'm not suggesting that there's anything amiss in these figures, they could of course be totally accurate, but I do wonder... perhaps like I said it doesn't do to presume you know too much?

Tuesday, 15 November 2011

New story tomorrow...

I've nearly finished a new short story, probably be up tomorrow. Will definitely appeal to those of you who like the 'forced-bi cuckolding' fantasy...

Well, so far it seems it's all or nothing...

More votes in the ladies poll and a few trickling onto the mens poll all leading to the slightly surprising conclusion that the majority of women either masturbate 'rarely' or 'every day'. Of course it could be that women who masturbate 1-3 times a week are a little less 'open' about it? Hmm, I have a feeling that we're never really going to get to the bottom of this!

Femdom cave book update...

So, some of you longstanding readers may remember that way back in April or May I started writing a Femdom novel for FemdomCave. Well, at present there are 24,000 words written, but it has not been touched since July. Furthermore I had somewhat lost faith in it and needed a second opinion, so I sent it to FemdomCave and had them read it for me, to see whether it was worth persevering with.
I am pleased to say that the feedback I've received from them has been very positive (thanks for that FC) and with that boost and some direction from them, I think it can be worked into a saleable novel. Now I just need to find the time to get my head down and write!

Ten votes in the poll so far...

Thank you for your participation ladies. Not really gaining much insight from it though, since the votes are so evenly spread. Three votes for 'daily', the same for 'rarely' and two each for 'once a week' and '2-3 times a week'.
And more importantly, we still don't know if these orgasms are on top of orgasms achieved with a partner or not... I have an idea, what about a poll for the guys to see if we can't shed some more light on the subject?

Right chaps, time for you to vote. Please think carefully before you vote, if you don't know please vote accordingly, rather than assuming there's no way your wife gets herself off after you've thoroughly serviced her!
Remember, masturbation is 'me time' and doesn't necessarily reflect on you, or your performance. A lot of men feel threatened by female masturbation for some reason, I have no idea why, it's fucking hot!
For the record I voted 'Don't know'.
It would be more than a little presumptuous of me to vote 'rarely', despite what I may 'think', and anyway, I like the thought of Mistress R pleasuring herself, especially as it reinforces her dominance over me (taking for herself what she denies me).

Altogether now chaps.... "If only she'd let me watch!".
:)

Monday, 14 November 2011

Crazy...

Another record day! 3168 hits, that's over 9,000 hits in three days!!!!!

And follower number 90 too, welcome!

New poll for ladies only...

Ladies, I know there are a few of you who read my blog, so please take the time to vote in my latest poll and tell us how many times a week you masturbate. Perhaps some of you might even like to comment  (anonymously if you wish) and tell us how you arrive at this figure. For instance, if you vote 'rarely' is this because your slave keeps you totally satisfied or are you just incredibly busy? On the other hand if you are rubbing one out every single day is that because your fella wouldn't know a clitoris if he fell over it, or are you just exceptionally horny?

Thank you in advance for your participation.
:)

Further to my previous post...

In my previous post I mused briefly on the female perspective regarding men's desire for self-pleasuring, and whether this was distorted by their own (lesser) desire for the same (to recap, I was pondering whether Mistress R understood quite what an achievement I thought it was to 'only' touch my cock three times in three weeks). So I Googled 'female masturbation' and (eventually ;)) came up with this...

"A new study reveals 92% of women regularly take time out to masturbate, a huge jump from the findings of previous studies (74% in 1979 and 62% in 1953)."

Does it? Or are women just more willing to admit it now?

"The Gossard Big M Survey interviewed 1,000 women, ages 18-30, and their answers indicate that not only do 9 out of 10 women play with themselves, two-thirds do it three times a week. The study refers to these as "sessions," which we can assume doesn't refer to the number of orgasms achieved, but rather, the time spent achieving them. 'Cause you know that if you have one, you stick around for more. Orgasms from masturbating are like Payless shoes: Once you get the first pair, you get the second for next to nothing."

Well that's a bit of a generalisation, since I know many women can only cum once in one 'session' (most famously, legendary porn star Nina Hartley, and God knows she's tried!), but I digress....

What they don't address (more to the point) is are these women in relationships, single or just plain horny? It wouldn't particularly surprise me if the average 18-30 year old woman liked to cum three times a week, but I would be slightly surprised if the average 18-30 woman was masturbating three times a week on top of a satisfying sexual relationship (with a male or female partner). Or maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm just conforming to male stereotypes by believing that women desire orgasm less frequently than men?

I was going to suggest a poll on the subject (since my blog has been sadly poll free for over a week now) but I'm not sure if the (few) ladies who view my blog would really be representative of womankind as a whole. Oh what the hell, let's do it anyway!

Femdom session 13th November 2011...

I woke up this morning with the hardest morning wood you could possibly imagine, this despite an annoying pain in my foot (which thankfully seems to have gone away now). The temptation to touch it was huge, it would have been wonderful to stroke it, squeeze it and to jerk it until it erupted over my stomach, but of course none of that  is allowed. This is not news, it has not been allowed since April, but yesterday's session was a stark reminder that I must try harder not to touch my cock without permission. Sure I can proudly say that I haven't made myself cum without permission in all that time, but I still haven't quite got to grips with the not touching part of Mistress R's control, have I?
What can I say, it's a tough thing to do. For most of my life I've been able to touch my cock whenever I want and now I can't, of course that's not going to be easy to get used to, is it? In fact, sometimes I do think that guys who have their cock's 'locked' have it easy. Oh sure, they have to deal with the inconvenience of being caged, but having that temptation removed must be a hell of a help. Still, having worn a cage for just a few minutes I'm in no real position to judge am I? And I'm sure there's a lot of caged guys reading this thinking 'yeah, why don't you try it then!'.
Anyway, I know that Mistress R is not a big fan of the idea of a chastity device, she would much rather have me learn self-control to show my obedience and submission to her, and that makes perfect sense to me. I wonder sometimes if she ever believed I would have the self-control to go this long without making myself cum, and even if she did then she must have known it would take a long time for me to get used to not even touching my cock without permission. Or maybe not. Perhaps women simply don't feel the need to touch themselves as often as men? Hmm, a quick google suggests this may be bollocks (and gives me a subject for my next post).
Whatever, what I can say with absolute certainty is that it's a very rare day that passes without me wanting to stroke my cock, and that has increased several fold since we started down the chastity route. Firstly because I have found that chastity has had a significant effect on my libido generally, secondly because my balls are always full, and thirdly (of course) because telling someone they can't have something, or do something, is like a red rag to a bull isn't it? So for me to have only touched my cock three times in three weeks seems nothing short of a minor miracle to me.
Mistress R however, sees it quite differently, or at least that is the impression I got yesterday morning when she began the session by punishing me for it. I couldn't tell whether she was actually really pissed off with me or whether she was just playing her role really fantastically right from the start, but she certainly wasn't holding back with the whip or the paddle as she warmed my arse! Twelve lashes of the whip for starters (I thought that was fair exchange for three touches), followed by nine swats with the paddle which left me pulling away and spitting out my thanks through clenched teeth (and I can still feel them a little now!).
After that Mistress R had me turn and face the bed where she reclined, toying her pussy with her fingers as she had me worship her feet (sadly I couldn't see any of this as I was blindfolded from the start). Once again, like last time, Mistress R was in fine form, verbally berating me for my inability to keep my hands of my cock and telling me that perhaps since the paddle and whip still aren't getting the message over, perhaps she would have to refrain from touching my cock completely or maybe only teasing it through my clothes, until I started behaving as she wanted me to.
She went on to remind me that I willingly gave up my pleasure for the benefit of her pleasure and that anything that happens in future will be because it is the way she wants it. If she wants to tease me every night, or not touch me for a week, a month, or longer, then that is her choice. If she decides to allow me to cum, that is because it pleases her. If she wants me to swallow it, that again is for her pleasure. Everything is for her pleasure (so fucking hot!).
She held her wet fingers in front of my face and told me to suck them clean, which I eagerly did, gaining my first taste of her beautiful pussy for five days. She pulled them away and I continued to suck her toes and kiss her feet all over, while she returned to stroking her pussy. She also suggested that perhaps as a punishment for my illegal touching she should just keep me there, on the floor, for the whole hour, worshipping her feet while she brought herself to orgasm. How frustrating would that be for me, she said. Being close to her as she came, but not being a part of it or even being able to see it.
I have to say, Mistress R probably couldn't see it from where she was laying, but my cock was rock hard every time she said these evil things, I love it when she really gets into her role and gives her wicked side a free reign. I have long believed that Mistress R has it within her to be a wonderful, wonderful domme and every session seems to bring more and more of that out of her. I can only dream of how amazing she will be in another year or so. However, Mistress R decided not to leave me on my knees the whole session and instead had me lay spreadeagled on the bed, at which point a rather elementary mistake was discovered...
Ever since we started doing these sessions (well over ten years ago), it has been my job to prepare the room. This means fitting the PVC sheet, getting all the sex toys, lube, whips, paddles and suchlike out, making sure the room is sufficiently heated if necessary, etc... Also, it is my job to retrieve the leather cords from under the mattress (they are attached to the slats underneath the bed), which Mistress uses to attach to my wrist and ankle cuffs. It was now apparent that this part of my duties had been overlooked (never ever done that before!). Thankfully Mistress R decided not to make a big deal out of it, but told me to stay in position as though I was bound, before straddling my face and ordering my 'Tongue out!'.
After a minute or so of riding my face, she moved down and squatted over my rock hard cock, teasing her pussy with the tip before sliding down on it. Almost immediately she lifted herself off but then decided she wanted it after all and sank all the way down, as you can imagine, it felt absolutely wonderful! Then she lifted herself off again and straddled my face once more, now I could taste my cock on her pussy too which made my poor cock even harder.
I was still blindfolded at this point and Mistress R spent the next ten minutes or so alternating between having me lick her beautiful pussy and slapping and tormenting my cock. She slapped it, and slapped it, and slapped it and I loved every second of it. She must have slapped it a hundred times, and several times she seemed to catch my balls too, which I wasn't sure if that was accidental or not, but then she straight out delivered a slap to my balls which was definitely not accidental! It didn't really hurt, but it made a lovely slapping noise and I loved that she had done it, because I've been wanting her to do that for quite a while and now she won't be worried about doing it when she wants to.
Then she decided I needed a dildo up my ass and once that was in place she tormented my cock a little more before leaving me to stew for a while. Again she reminded me to stay as if I was bound, even though I wasn't and told me to spend my time thinking about how much better it felt when she touched my cock than it did when I did it without her permission. She also told me to think about how good it was going to feel when she came back and let me eat her pussy and make her cum...
To be honest I was really getting a little close to the edge by now and the break was exactly what I needed to try to settle the unrest in my balls. Ten minutes of quiet reflection helped a lot and when she returned, Mistress R removed my blindfold which meant I got my first glimpse of her since the session began about forty minutes before.
I don't know if Mistress R had been wearing any fetish clothing earlier, but now she was entirely naked excpet for a black bra. She looked gorgeous and I took the risk of speaking out of turn to tell her so. She accepted my compliment graciously and then told me to get up on my knees. Mistress R slid onto the bed in front of me and spent a short time scratching my cock, balls and perineum with her toenails before instructing me to eat her pussy and make her cum. Finally the moment I had been waiting for since Tuesday!
It was wonderful to service Mistress finally and I was so happy when she came long and hard. She got off the bed and the puddle of pussy juice left behind on the PVC sheet had my licking my lips. But first Mistress had me lick her clean, as her juices were dripping down her legs. Satisfied that I had got every drop, Mistress R ordered me to lick the sheet clean before having me roll over onto my back once more.
She stood over me, facing my feet, giving me a wonderful view of her soaking wet pussy and gorgeous ass. I so wanted to tongue her ass then, and she knew it. She lowered her ass onto my face as she stroked my cock, telling me that she was rubbing her ass on my face for her pleasure and that I was not allowed to lick it. My cock was soon throbbing hard again and she stroked it for a while, again reminding me that I needed to make a determined effort not to touch my cock without her permission. She told me that she would much prefer it if I asked her permission more often, even though she wouldn't guarantee that permission would be granted.
Then she lowered her gorgeous ass onto my face again and told me that she wanted me to cum like this, desperate to lick her asshole, but not allowed to. I breathed in the musky scent of her ass and felt two weeks of cum bubbling in my balls, I knew I couldn't last much longer, and I wanted so much to push my tongue into her ass, but I knew it wasn't allowed and this produced a wonderfully frustrating and submissive edge to what proved to be a very long and intense orgasm.
I had hardly finished cumming when I felt Mistress R's cum covered fingers pressing into my mouth. I obediently licked them clean and swallowed my cum as she scooped up more from my leg and cock, it seemed so long since I had cum this way and it felt absolutely amazing.
Well, what a way to end a week off! Mistress R doesn't know it yet but I left a little present on her dressing table this morning for her to find when she gets home from work (hopefully that will help her overlook the fact that I forgot to place her neatly folded towels in the bathroom this morning!*), yesterday's session was so amazing and I really just wanted to let her know just how much I value her growing confidence, dominance and love. I just wish I didn't have to wait another four weeks to experience another hour with Mistress R in full swing, ah well. Maybe I can bring a little of her out in the meantime....

*I'm pretty sure I've never mentioned this on here before. I've no desire to be a maid, I'm not angling to start hand washing her smalls, or anything like that. It's just a little thing I like to do, to make Mistress R feel special. Like as if she was staying in a nice hotel or something, you know... the great thing about it is it's not emasculating, it's just thoughtful. Most women (including Mistress R) would probably think it was a bit weird if I started putting out her underwear for her, or something like that, but towels are just towels at the end of the day. I think it's a good way to show your wife that you are thinking of her and want to be attentive without it being linked to sex, which I think most women would appreciate and find attractive. Why not try it yourself?

Sunday, 13 November 2011

This always happens...

Whenever I get a new record day, the next day I always seem to get another day that's almost as good and would have been a new record too. Yesterday we had 2991 hits, still much more than the old record, and that means over 6,000 hits this weekend. Amazing. Also welcome to the two new followers who have signed up this weekend, thanks for your interest.

I will be writing about yesterday's session shortly...

Tomorrow...

I will find time to write about this morning's Femdom session, all I will say now is that it (and Mistress R) were phenomenal!

3000 hits in one day...

Wow, we made it! Just... 3012 hits yesterday, quite amazing. It's strange that the days I post the most are never the days with the greatest hits, there seems to be almost no correlation between the two. Ah well, I guess if new people are finding the site for the first time and then trawl the whole thing that adds a lot, after all I've made something like 940 posts since the blog started back in April 2011.

Supposed to be our Femdom session today. I'm not feeling great right now and Mistress R is still in bed, but hopefully it will go ahead as planned.

Saturday, 12 November 2011

Wow, a new record today...

My old 'single' day hits record has fallen already and there's still nearly two hours to go, can we get to 3,000 hits? I would be very surprised, but it's not that far away. Amazing!

Tomorrow morning will be our Femdom session (all being well), I am so looking forward to it, especially since Mistress R decided to partake of a little 'denial' herself since her last orgasm on Tuesday and so I haven't been allowed to taste her gorgeous pussy since then. I'm really unsure whether she will let me cum tomorrow or not. I've thought all along that she would, and still I'm 60% going in that direction, but on the other hand, maybe not.
In all honesty the only thing that matters to me tomorrow is that Mistress R has a really hard, satisfying orgasm, anything else is just a bonus.
The best thing about our sessions for me is always that Mistress R really has the time and space to relax into her character and she really comes alive, I fucking love the things she says to me during the session, it is so hot to hear her talking about 'her cock' and things like how long she might make me wait to be allowed to cum and things like that. It's great when she comes out with something really memorable like 'You wouldn't dream of asking me to let you cum, would you?', but even the simplest phrases still convey powerful messages sometimes, especially anything to do with it being 'her cock', 'her choice'. 'up to her', anything like that. And then of course there's the big guns, the lines she pulls out when she's really into her role, like asking me if I would suck another man's cock after it had been up her ass if she wanted me too....
Ooooh, I hope there's plenty of those kind of lines tomorrow. And if she does allow me to cum, I hope she makes me eat every last drop too.

Thursday, 10 November 2011

The sanctity of marriage...

You know, I've long thought that marriage has become a bit of a joke. Just look at that Kardashian woman, splitting up after 72 days, and probably the whole thing was a publicity stunt anyway. Not that she's the only 'celebrity' whoring her wedding out for cash. Then there's the wedding TV shows, (oh sure I watch them, so I'm as guilty as anyone.. can't get enough of those huge, crazy, black women on Bridezillas) giving all and sundry the opportunity to be a 'celebrity' for their big day. In fact the whole thing about getting married seems (for a lot of people) to have turned into an excuse to have a party, wear a stupidly expensive dress and get themselves into a shit-load of debt. The whole 'I want to spend the rest of my life with this person' bit seems to only be an afterthought, if indeed it is thought about at all...
Truth be told it pisses me off because although I am not in the slightest bit religious, I take my marriage vows very seriously indeed. Mistress R and I got married in the early nineties when we were in our early twenties, and even before the whole chastity thing I kind of wished there was something 'more' that people who were actually serious about their commitment to each other could progress to. Of course in the BDSM community there is, with the whole collaring ceremony thing, but at the time I was more thinking of something a little more vanilla. I suppose there's always the tattooing each other's names on your skin route, but I'm not big on tattoo's really. And anyway, there's plenty of dumbasses who have got their ex-spouse's name tattooed on them already, isn't there? (Tommy Lee, Pamela Anderson to name but two).
No, almost anything that can be thought up will eventually migrate to the mainstream and become devalued, unless that something takes some sort of long term 'effort', because 'effort' is not the 'dumbasses' strong point (cost is never a real barrier, because somehow 'dumbasses' always seem to find ways of making considerable amounts of cash, but 'effort' is a whole other ballgame).
Just to be clear, I'm not ragging on everyone who has ever got divorced, or separated, I'm not suggesting that you should stay with someone indefinitely if you are no longer happy or things have changed just because you promised you would. I'm sure most people can see that there is a palpable difference between people who are entering into marriage which later turns out to be a mistake and people who are having a WEDDING FOR THE SAKE OF HAVING A WEDDING.
Anyway, rant over. As I said, I do feel that there should be some 'higher' level of marriage (kinda like an 'advanced driving licence') for people who are actually 'serious' about their commitment to each other, and it should be something which requires some kind of sustained effort. Jewellery makers have already introduced the 'eternity' ring of course, but anyone can buy one of those if they have the cash, so really, so what?
Yeah sure, Mistress R does have an eternity ring and when I bought it for her it was symbolic of our commitment to each other after a slightly shaky period of our marriage. But if I had any doubt that I still wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, then I wouldn't have done it. Indeed, my previous girlfriend once asked me to buy her one and I point blank refused, not because of the cost, but simply because even though I was in a (pretty crap) relationship with her, I was pretty sure I wasn't going to be spending the rest of my life with her, and I wasn't about to give her something like that, with no intention of standing behind it.
So what's this got to do with anything, you might rightfully ask, well... of course it comes back to chastity. Something which requires sustained effort, something which can't be bought, something which is mostly shared only between the couple practising it.... something which doesn't have to pander to self-indulgent commercialisation, doesn't require precious metals and expensive stones (unless you particularly wanted that ruby encrusted titanium cock-tube of course), doesn't warrant front page headlines in trashy magazines (well, perhaps it would if it were talked about!), yet something which does make the couple closer, more loving, more intimate... probably even happier than ever if it works out right.
It all makes a lot of sense doesn't it?
As I lay in bed last night, half asleep, half drunk on lust (yes I was reading the filth before I turned out the lights again), waiting for Mistress R to come to bed and tease me a little before sleep, I pondered if Mistress R has really yet grasped just how much I love and adore her. It's hard to say of course, since there's a limit to how much we can ever really know anyone, but I think she has at least some idea.
It's hard to explain to someone who isn't submissive that feeling you get when you know that you would do 'x' for your Mistress if she asked you too. It may never happen, it may not be something that your Mistress actually wants to happen, but in a way that isn't that important. It's like the perverts answer to 'I would take a bullet for you', nobody wants to see their partner 'take a bullet' for them, it's merely an expression conveying depth of feeling. And merely coming to realise that you would do something for another person out of love which you would not, or could not do for yourself is at once overwhelming and quite humbling actually... at least that was my experience.*

*You can read more about this here

Captions and lurkers...

Three times today I've seen my captions on other people's sites (uncredited), not that it really matters. It's not like I'm going to sue for breach of intellectual property, after all I steal the photo's from here there and everywhere, don't I? So who cares.... the only thing worse than being talked about, is not being talked about, as I believe Oscar Wilde said. (Isn't that right mrsjspet?)

---

So apparently today it's 'Love Our Lurkers' day or something... don't really know what that's all about. It would be nice if some of you lurkers would leave a comment now and again, it can be anonymous if you want. I get anywhere between 1,500-2,700 hits a day so there must be a lot more people here than the 6 or 7 who leave comments over and over (shakes fist and scowls menacingly).

Wednesday, 9 November 2011

Not as close as I thought...

I was all geared up for my 1,000th post today, but then I noticed I had 64 drafts and once I'd deleted those, well, I was back down to 934. Never mind, I've done a few captions for you which will appear throughout the day, hope you like them...

Tuesday, 8 November 2011

A contented Mistress...

Mistress R is feeling very contented right now, having just enjoyed another orgasm at the tip of my tongue. I too am feeling very content, having been stroked until hard and then mounted and ridden. Of course it's 'only' ten days since I was allowed to cum inside Mistress R, but every second of penetration is savoured since I never know when the next time I will be allowed inside her beautiful pussy will be... needless to say I wasn't allowed to cum, but I didn't expect that either. I am also starting to doubt my presumption that I will be allowed to cum on Sunday. Don't ask me why... because I don't know.

Moving on, after Mistress dismounted and steadfastly refused to touch my cock any further (I didn't ask but she must have known I wanted more, believe me she knew!) and I had calmed down, I asked her if she was still happy to be in control. I know we have discussed this many times and said that we must communicate on this, and I had no reason to doubt that she was still happy with our arrangement, but it doesn't hurt to ask. She said she was but that she wondered if one day, maybe in six months time, I might just change my mind and decide that I'd had enough of it.
Well obviously, I can't rule it out completely. Maybe one day the thought of a quick one off the wrist will seem more appealing than the exquisite torture of being teased again and again, for weeks on end, hoping that tonight will finally be the night and... no I can't see it happening either.
Still it's nice to know the option is there, should I ever decide that I've had enough, or that I need a break. But really, another six months down the line what I'm really hoping for is an even more contented, even more confident and even more dominant Mistress.

Almost but not quite...

Wow, 193 votes in my latest poll, that's quite remarkable, thanks to everyone who took part. As ever the full results are available on the 'Polls' tab, but it's worth noting a few things...

The most voted for option (with more than a fifth of all the votes) was 1-2 months, but if you've gone longer than that you are in the minority with only 21% of you clocking up 2 months or more. Similarly 26% of you haven't gone longer than a fortnight and the centre-point falls somewhere between 21 and 28 days (which is where my record is).

Frozen in (sub)space...

'k' left this comment on my blog yesterday, and I thought it warranted further discussion:

k said... Robert...i can so relate to being "frozen" or locked in sub-space!...There's no other drug like it in the world!!!

I often feel myself in this state, trapped between wanting to ask for something (but not penetration or cumming obviously, since these are not things I am permitted to ask for!), not wanting to 'top from the bottom', wanting Mistress R to be the one who gets to decide exactly what I am allowed or deserve and generally feeling in a state of 'limbo'. It's a hard thing to explain or describe but I'm sure many of us have felt it at one time or another.
As much as it is frustrating, this inability to just ask for something, I love feeling that way because it means I have slipped into that wonderful state of mind that comes with submission. This is accompanied by the most wonderful feelings of deep love for Mistress R and an extra sensitivity which renders every finger light touch almost capable of making me explode.
The interesting thing is that as time goes by Mistress R seems to be able to bring on this feeling with less and less effort. Last night I again made the decision to go to bed before midnight, and read some more porn before bed (check out my new 'Literotica' tab to see what I'm reading). Mistress R came to bed about 12:20am, no wine tonight though... But of course, the closeness of her silky smooth skin combined with the after effects of what I'd read a short while earlier soon conspired to produce a rock hard erection and since I 'think' I might be allowed to cum on Sunday, I decided that ten days was long enough to wait to use my first 'request'.
'Please may I touch my cock Mistress?' I asked, and Mistress R granted me permission, a slightly amused tone in her voice. Instead of rolling onto my back and jerking my cock I stayed right where I was and steadily fucked my hand as I kissed her shoulder. Feeling her so close was so wonderful even though she wasn't making any attempt to join in, but the thing that made it so good was how she spoke to me as I felt my cock sliding back and forth through my fist.
After reminding me not to allow myself cum, she told me that, even as I was enjoying this I should be thinking how much better it would be the next time she decided to tease me herself...
I whispered to her that I couldn't wait to eat her pussy again, and she replied that I should focus on thinking about tasting her as I jerked my cock, think about being between her legs and worshipping her beautiful pussy...
Then she looked up at the clock projected on the ceiling and told me that was enough and it was time to go to sleep. My cock was like a telegraph pole, and once again as I obediently removed my hand my cock seemed to throb still harder, my breathing seemed more laboured. It seemed to take forever until I calmed down and even then when I felt I could roll over and go to sleep, my cock got hard again.
I have come to the conclusion that what really brings out my sub-side is not fetish clothing or the threat of the paddle, but simply the confidence in Mistress R's voice. I'm not talking about a 'put-on' Domme voice, it's simply that Mistress R now knows that I will do what she tells me and as such her voice naturally conveys authority.
If Mistress R tells me to stop touching she knows that I will, if she tells me to squeeze my balls or edge myself, or even whip my own cock and balls, she knows that I would do those things without question. I think this is a valuable piece of information for any of you reading this who want to live this way but are still taking those first steps.
If you really want this, then first and foremost you have to help her build her confidence. And you do that by doing what she tells you to do. If she says she's not letting you cum today, don't whine, this is what you told her you wanted. How annoying must it be to have your husband/boyfriend/lover tell you that he wants you to control his orgasms and even access to his cock, only for him to moan and bitch when you do as he asked?
In the beginning she's not going to feel comfortable giving you 'orders', and I know it's pretty basic stuff here but the way you allow her confidence to grow is to do as she says! Just do it. The better you play your part the easier it will be for her to play hers.
It won't happen overnight either, Mistress R has had seven months of compliance from me* and she has come on leaps and bounds since we started. But I fully expect that in another year or so (assuming Mistress R doesn't change her mind about continuing this) she will have become even more confident. It's all about the long game, which isn't to say that I am in any way dissatisfied now, it's just that I think it will be even better the longer it goes on and the more 'normal' my sexual submission becomes to her.
So if you are in the process of trying to persuade your wife that this is what you would like to do (and I know that isn't easy) just think ahead and try and instil into yourself the discipline to respect the authority that you want her to assume. Every time you moan, whinge, bitch, cheat or ignore her instructions you are undermining her confidence, and in the long run all you are doing is undermining the progress of your relationship to where you say you want it to be.

* I know some of you will be thinking, yeah well what about the illegal touching? And I admit that I haven't been as good in that area as I would like and I am trying to improve my performance regarding that facet of her control. However, more importantly (I feel), I have never cum without her permission, I have never 'asked' for penetration (since she told me that I wasn't allowed to), albeit one could argue that I did address this through my blog and, in hindsight, I do regret that. I have followed her instructions when she gives me permission to touch my cock, and I have only asked her to let me cum once (since she told me that I wasn't allowed to ask) and that was right at the start and I only said it because I wanted to hear her tell me 'no'.

And that's another thing, you have to be prepared for things to not be 'quite' the way you expected them to be. I didn't expect that Mistress R would forbid me from touching my cock without permission (and punish me for the inevitable infringements), I never thought that she would impose a rule that only she could initiate penetration, and it certainly never occurred to me that she wouldn't allow me to ask/beg to be allowed to cum! Indeed I fully expected that she would eventually want to hear me begging to cum, just so that she could tell me 'no'. But I guess she doesn't need to hear it, she knows I want to cum, doesn't she. And I guess it makes it a lot easier not to give in if I'm not constantly bleating in her ear.
The truth is that each of these were not exactly what I was expecting, but it's funny how quickly you adapt, get used to, and even come to like new rules, especially when you want your wife/lover/Mistress to feel empowered. Sure there was a time when I got a little frustrated about the lack of penetration that Mistress wanted, but I am over it now. Even if she offered me the chance to change any of the rules she has made, I would not change any of them. Not a single one. Because I see that all the rules and all the little things are part of the whole package, and the difference I see in Mistress R is a wonderful thing. I wanted to be sexually submissive to her and that's what I am, we are both probably happier than we have ever been and I genuinely hope that over the coming years Mistress R's confidence and dominance continues to grow at whatever pace is right for her.
Obviously I don't know for sure where this may lead, but I am confident in the strength of our relationship and know that we are smart enough not to let anything undermine the solidity of our 18 year marriage, because that remains the most important thing.