FEMDOM SESSION 28th April 2012

A thankfully rare occurrence.

Before I tell you about what happened this morning, it would be useful to give you some background from earlier in the week. On Thursday, after my tooth problems had subsided a little, we finally got around to some pussy worship for Mistress R. I still wasn’t feeling 100% but I really wanted to make her cum, she was still bothered about my mouth and wasn’t relaxed or into it really, so it was very unsatisfying for her. She did cum eventually, but not a ‘good’ one. For my part I didn’t mind how long it took, since I would gladly start all over again if she would let me after every time, but the fact that it didn’t work very well kinda killed any enthusiasm I had for any teasing I might be getting, and so we left it for the night (actually I did get some the night before which I never blogged about).

This of course, added some pressure to this morning’s session, and I’ve still not been feeling great to be honest, I’ve been feeling a bit dizzy on and off (a side effect of the antibiotics I’m taking for my tooth) and considering I’ve not cum for over three weeks my cock is nowhere near as throbbing as I would expect it to be (not so concerned about that though because it was fine before my root canal and I’m sure it’ll sort itself out soon).

Thankfully Mistress R has obviously noticed this too and she told me to start the session wearing my Oxballs Cocksling and my wrist and ankle cuffs. To be honest I was somewhat sceptical about the kind of performance I was going to be able to manage today (cock wise), but all I really cared about was making sure that Mistress R had a really nice, hard cum.

My balls felt very tight inside the Cocksling, for some reason it seemed to be gripping them harder than it was my cock, in fact I wonder if I might have had it on the wrong way round… well I don’t know, I don’t think so. In any case, when Mistress entered the bedroom she used her beautiful foot to stimulate my cock and balls as she asked me whether or not I had managed to keep my hands off of my cock this month.

To be honest, it seems so long since our last session that I’d kind of forgotten exactly how many times I’d broken the rule, but I made an educated guess at seven times (in five weeks). Mistress R made straight for the whip and the paddle and told me to lean over the bed.

Whipped Balls

I leaned over the bed as Mistress instructed and waited for the first slash of the whip. It came soon enough, but what I hadn’t anticipated was that the way I was positioned along with the way the Cocksling was pulling on my balls meant that they were proud of the backs of my legs and so the first thing I felt was an intense stinging sensation across the back of my balls! 

I jumped a little and winced out my ‘One, thank you Mistress’, before adjusting my position and pulling my balls forward by straightening my back. Thankfully that did the trick and while the next thirteen strokes stung more than enough for my liking (I know it doesn’t sound a lot, but I am not into pain at all… I just like the fact that Mistress R is dominating me), at least any further accidental ball whipping was avoided. I have caught the odd stray whip on the balls before, but it’s usually a kind of aftershock where some of the whip has spilled between my legs. That’s actually quite enjoyable, whereas this was pretty much full on ball whipping!

After this Mistress R gave me seven whacks with the paddle, the first six of which where tolerable, but the seventh stung like merry fuck. I can’t imagine how anyone takes being paddled until their ass is really red. I’d be screaming like a little bitch by then! Hahaha… The funny thing is though that the paddle  (and the whip to some extent) does sting but the sensation goes pretty quickly really, I can’t imagine how much it would take so that you couldn’t ‘sit down’ (as they say).

After this Mistress R sat on the bed in front of me and reached down to stroke my cock while she reminded me yet again that I really shouldn’t touch my cock without her permission. She reminded me that she controls my cock, my balls and my ass. When she said about my balls, she dragged her nails across them, which is quite intense when they are trapped and tight, even more so when they’ve just been whipped! Finally Mistress R eased herself back onto the bed and I was able to relax for a few seconds before she told me to start worshipping her feet.

Mistress R’s beautiful feet.

Finally, after five long weeks I got to worship Mistress R’s beautifully pedicured feet, with her beautifully painted toes. I adore Mistress R’s feet. The times over the last few weeks I’ve wanted to get on my knees and kiss them while she watches TV or reads a book, but it’s too cold at the moment, and the last thing I want to do is for her to become uncomfortable, so I wait for Summer I suppose.

As I carefully worshipped Mistress’s beautiful feet she asked me some questions about when I touched my cock without permission, I said that often it was when she had got up in the morning and I had morning wood, or after we had been cuddling at night and she had gone to sleep. Mistress R seemed satisfied that even if I was disobeying rules I was still only thinking of her when I was touching my cock (which is true). Not that that’s any excuse of course, I will try harder this month for sure.

As I continued to suck on Mistress’s gorgeous toes, she started to rub her pussy and it was very difficult to keep my eyes down and concentrate on the job at hand. She asked me if it was becoming difficult to concentrate and I told her that it was. ‘Good’, she said.

The next thing I knew she was leaning forward and offering her glass dildo to my mouth. “Get it wet for me,” she said. I removed my lips from her toes and took the dildo into my mouth, being careful to leave it nice and wet for her as ordered. I resumed worshipping Mistress’s feet and I could hear her start to rub the dildo against her pussy, before long she was telling me how good it felt having something so hard inside her, and she began musing on whether or not she would allow my cock inside her today.

What if I only ever let you taste my pussy off of my glass dildo, and never from the source?

This continued a while longer and then she leaned forward again and presented me with her dildo to clean. I took the glass cock into my mouth and tasted the beautiful taste of Mistress R’s pussy, it was so nice to taste that again. As I cleaned the dildo Mistress R said, “What if only ever let you taste my pussy off of my glass dildo, and never from the source, would you like that?”.

Well, of course not! But that is not the answer that Mistress would expect so I replied ‘Whatever pleases you Mistress’. Strangely, when she said that, that was the first time that my cock started to get hard on it’s own, without even being touched. It just shows that sex is 90% mental, so when your head isn’t in the game (like ours wasn’t on Thursday) it’s never as good.

Mistress started fucking herself with her dildo again while I continued worshipping her feet, concentration was becoming even more difficult now of course and I started to try and sneak a glance up without Mistress noticing. I couldn’t see anything unfortunately…

Shortly after, Mistress R had me clean her dildo once more and then told me to get on the bed and lie on my back. I complied immediately and she secured me at all four corners with the ties that are tied to the bed frame. Mistress R blindfolded me and then started to play with my cock, again I wish I had recorded what she said so that I could transcribe it, because it was sooooo hot. She soon straddled my face though and she was already wet when I started to lick her beautiful pussy as she ground it against my face. I love being underneath her like that, I really do. Shame I was blindfolded, but…

Mistress turned around and pushed her ass into my face as she started playing with my cock again, allowing me to breathe in the musky scent of her ass. I know better than to lick her ass without permission but she knew that being so close would just increase my want for it.
She turned around again and straddled my face, ordering me to lick her pussy. A few seconds later she moved down the bed and sank down onto my cock, riding it for maybe thirty seconds or so before getting off again. It felt so good being inside her again, it seems like forever, although it’s probably a couple of weeks or so, I’m not too sure.

Using your cock as a dildo, for my pleasure.

Mistress R continued teasing me with her fingers, her pussy and her mouth, occasionally reminding me that my cock really belonged to her now and that she was just using it like a dildo for her pleasure. I love it when she says these things. After riding my cock again she knelt at the side of me and then stroked my cock before offering her fingers one by one to my mouth to lick clean.

“You love the taste of my pussy juice don’t you… and you can probably taste your cock a little bit too can’t you?” She said.

I could indeed.

“And you love that too don’t you?”

Of course I do.

Mistress straddled my face again and then moved down the bed once more, I felt her grasp my hard cock and start rubbing it against herself.

“I'm rubbing your cock against my ass now slave,” she whispered, filling my mind with all sorts of images and thoughts that I know will never be allowed in reality.

“Now I’m rubbing it against my pussy slave, which one do you like the most?”

I could think of no sensible answer and answered that I didn’t know.

Mistress laughed and said that was a good answer, since I wouldn’t want to be forced to choose between them.

If you didn’t have the blindfold on you could see my ass.

She straddled my face once again for another licking and then I felt her turn around and mount me again, this time facing away from me. It feels really different this way, more intense and I could feel my balls starting to tighten as I neared the edge.

“If you didn’t have the blindfold on right now, you could look down and see my gorgeous ass as I ride your cock,” she said. I would loved to have seen that, it seems a long time since I was allowed that pleasure.

She dismounted again and gave my cock some more slaps (there was a lot of lovely slapping today) and a gentle one to my balls too (all that’s needed when you’re in the cocksling I can assure you), before attaching clothes pins to my nipples and inserting a dildo in my asshole. She grabbed the hairbrush off the bedside table and dragged it all over my cock, which was a lot more effective than it has been in the past I thought, probably because the cocksling was pulling skin tight, I’m not sure if I’m glad she didn’t use it on my balls or not…

Then she left me alone for a few minutes, while my cock recovered from the edge it had sustained while she rode it.

When she came back she plucked the clothes pegs off of my nipples, withdrew the dildo from my ass and released me from my restraints.

“Kneel on the bed and take your cocksling off,” she said as she added a few extra pillows to the bed and lay back on them, her silky smooth thighs spread wide presenting me with my first real view of her delicious pussy. Earlier she had been wearing a PVC skirt, but now she was completely naked except for a black bra and the key pendant that I bought for her to celebrate our first year of male chastity. She looked so amazing, I couldn’t wait to make her cum.

At her instruction I started gently kissng around her pussy and as she responded to my touch I gently licked her pussy, slowly adding one finger at a time until I had three fingers inside her. At first Mistress seemed to be responding very well but then it seemed to go a little quiet and I started to get a little worried. But fortunately it wasn’t much longer before Mistress bucked against my tongue and I felt so happy then, I absolutely hate it when Mistress doesn’t cum properly (or at all), thankfully that hardly ever happens these days.

I am going to allow you to cum, but only if you can cum by the time I count to ten.

I licked my fingers clean of Mistress’s juices, but that aside there was rather unusually little more to clean up, either on the PVC sheet or on Mistress herself, which was a tiny bit disappointing. Still, it was much more important that Mistress had a satisfying cum, that was all I wanted out of this session, anything else was a bonus.

Soon Mistress had me back on my back again and she stroked and slapped my cock until it was nice and hard (even without the Cocksling). Then she straddled me and lowered her ass to my mouth once again, in the past she has denied me the opportunity to lick her but still teased me as she stroked my cock so I still wasn’t sure that she was going to let me worship her, especially since I had confessed to seven illegal touches.

But no, this time Mistress was obviously feeling lenient (perhaps the relief of her orgasm put her in a good mood?) and she told me that she was going to allow me to lick her ass. I stuck out my tongue and started to gently lick her puckered hole as she continued stroking my cock, harder now, suggesting that she was going to let me cum, but who knows?

Before long Mistress R told me that she was going to allow me to cum, but only if I came before she counted to ten, otherwise I would have to wait a very long time. I’d love to say that it was a close run thing, but in truth, I was already holding back and Mistress R’s ‘threat’ (combined with the pleasure of rimming her ass) was making that even harder. I would love for her to play those kind of games in the future, especially if she said she would let go at ‘1’ no matter what, even if I was already cumming. So fucking hot….

I think I started to cum about ‘8’, if not before and it became extremely intense extremely quickly. I’ve read where other people have said that their first orgasm after a long wait is almost too intense to really enjoy properly and that the second one is much better, but I’ve never really experienced that for myself before. This time though, straight away I was bucking very hard, but lacked the presence of mind to just ask Mistress R to stop pumping my cock, which I know she would have done had I asked her.

Don’t misunderstand, it was still great to finally be allowed to cum, of course… but the weird thing is that, over the last year or so (and I’m sure plenty of others will back me up on this) the actual orgasm itself, long awaited and desired as it may be, isn’t really the most important thing to me any more. As much as I love to cum, I think I love to be to stroked, slapped, scratched, sucked, ridden, facefucked, teased and denied even more. If orgasm control teaches you anything it is that you should appreciate the whole experience rather than just the last five seconds, and if the last five seconds were just a little bit too intense, that certainly didn’t affect the other 59 minutes and 55 seconds.

Besides, the most important thing for me today was to make sure Mistress R came, and she did. After that I wanted to worship her ass, her pussy, her feet, all more than I wanted to cum. I love and worship  her so much that I would have willingly surrendered my orgasm to her just for the opportunity to see her laying on the bed with her gorgeous legs spread and her beautiful, wet pussy waiting for my tongue, and I got way more than that today.

Yes indeed, I am a happy subbie right now, and I can’t wait for next month’s session!!!

Femdom Session - 28th April 2012

A thankfully rare occurrence.

Before I tell you about what happened this morning, it would be useful to give you some background from earlier in the week. On Thursday, after my tooth problems had subsided a little, we finally got around to some pussy worship for Mistress R. I still wasn't feeling 100% but I really wanted to make her cum, she was still bothered about my mouth and wasn't relaxed or into it really, so it was very unsatisfying for her. She did cum eventually, but not a 'good' one. For my part I didn't mind how long it took, since I would gladly start all over again if she would let me after every time, but the fact that it didn't work very well kinda killed any enthusiasm I had for any teasing I might be getting, and so we left it for the night (actually I did get some the night before which I never blogged about).

This of course, added some pressure to this morning's session, and I've still not been feeling great to be honest, I've been feeling a bit dizzy on and off (a side effect of the antibiotics I'm taking for my tooth) and considering I've not cum for over three weeks my cock is nowhere near as throbbing as I would expect it to be (not so concerned about that though because it was fine before my root canal and I'm sure it'll sort itself out soon).

Thankfully Mistress R has obviously noticed this too and she told me to start the session wearing my Oxballs Cocksling and my wrist and ankle cuffs. To be honest I was somewhat sceptical about the kind of performance I was going to be able to manage today (cock wise), but all I really cared about was making sure that Mistress R had a really nice, hard cum.

My balls felt very tight inside the Cocksling, for some reason it seemed to be gripping them harder than it was my cock, in fact I wonder if I might have had it on the wrong way round... well I don't know, I don't think so. In any case, when Mistress entered the bedroom she used her beautiful foot to stimulate my cock and balls as she asked me whether or not I had managed to keep my hands off of my cock this month.

To be honest, it seems so long since our last session that I'd kind of forgotten exactly how many times I'd broken the rule, but I made an educated guess at seven times (in five weeks). Mistress R made straight for the whip and the paddle and told me to lean over the bed.

Whipped Balls

I leaned over the bed as Mistress instructed and waited for the first slash of the whip. It came soon enough, but what I hadn't anticipated was that the way I was positioned along with the way the Cocksling was pulling on my balls meant that they were proud of the backs of my legs and so the first thing I felt was an intense stinging sensation across the back of my balls! 

I jumped a little and winced out my 'One, thank you Mistress', before adjusting my position and pulling my balls forward by straightening my back. Thankfully that did the trick and while the next thirteen strokes stung more than enough for my liking (I know it doesn't sound a lot, but I am not into pain at all... I just like the fact that Mistress R is dominating me), at least any further accidental ball whipping was avoided. I have caught the odd stray whip on the balls before, but it's usually a kind of aftershock where some of the whip has spilled between my legs. That's actually quite enjoyable, whereas this was pretty much full on ball whipping!

After this Mistress R gave me seven whacks with the paddle, the first six of which where tolerable, but the seventh stung like merry fuck. I can't imagine how anyone takes being paddled until their ass is really red. I'd be screaming like a little bitch by then! Hahaha... The funny thing is though that the paddle  (and the whip to some extent) does sting but the sensation goes pretty quickly really, I can't imagine how much it would take so that you couldn't 'sit down' (as they say).
After this Mistress R sat on the bed in front of me and reached down to stroke my cock while she reminded me yet again that I really shouldn't touch my cock without her permission. She reminded me that she controls my cock, my balls and my ass. When she said about my balls, she dragged her nails across them, which is quite intense when they are trapped and tight, even more so when they've just been whipped! Finally Mistress R eased herself back onto the bed and I was able to relax for a few seconds before she told me to start worshipping her feet.

Mistress R's beautiful feet.

Finally, after five long weeks I got to worship Mistress R's beautifully pedicured feet, with her beautifully painted toes. I adore Mistress R's feet. The times over the last few weeks I've wanted to get on my knees and kiss them while she watches TV or reads a book, but it's too cold at the moment, and the last thing I want to do is for her to become uncomfortable, so I wait for Summer I suppose.

As I carefully worshipped Mistress's beautiful feet she asked me some questions about when I touched my cock without permission, I said that often it was when she had got up in the morning and I had morning wood, or after we had been cuddling at night and she had gone to sleep. Mistress R seemed satisfied that even if I was disobeying rules I was still only thinking of her when I was touching my cock (which is true). Not that that's any excuse of course, I will try harder this month for sure.
As I continued to suck on Mistress's gorgeous toes, she started to rub her pussy and it was very difficult to keep my eyes down and concentrate on the job at hand. She asked me if it was becoming difficult to concentrate and I told her that it was. 'Good', she said.
The next thing I knew she was leaning forward and offering her glass dildo to my mouth. "Get it wet for me," she said. I removed my lips from her toes and took the dildo into my mouth, being careful to leave it nice and wet for her as ordered. I resumed worshipping Mistress's feet and I could hear her start to rub the dildo against her pussy, before long she was telling me how good it felt having something so hard inside her, and she began musing on whether or not she would allow my cock inside her today.

What if I only ever let you taste my pussy off of my glass dildo, and never from the source?

This continued a while longer and then she leaned forward again and presented me with her dildo to clean. I took the glass cock into my mouth and tasted the beautiful taste of Mistress R's pussy, it was so nice to taste that again. As I cleaned the dildo Mistress R said, "What if only ever let you taste my pussy off of my glass dildo, and never from the source, would you like that?".
Well, of course not! But that is not the answer that Mistress would expect so I replied 'Whatever pleases you Mistress'. Strangely, when she said that, that was the first time that my cock started to get hard on it's own, without even being touched. It just shows that sex is 90% mental, so when your head isn't in the game (like ours wasn't on Thursday) it's never as good.
Mistress started fucking herself with her dildo again while I continued worshipping her feet, concentration was becoming even more difficult now of course and I started to try and sneak a glance up without Mistress noticing. I couldn't see anything unfortunately...
Shortly after, Mistress R had me clean her dildo once more and then told me to get on the bed and lie on my back. I complied immediately and she secured me at all four corners with the ties that are tied to the bed frame. Mistress R blindfolded me and then started to play with my cock, again I wish I had recorded what she said so that I could transcribe it, because it was sooooo hot. She soon straddled my face though and she was already wet when I started to lick her beautiful pussy as she ground it against my face. I love being underneath her like that, I really do. Shame I was blindfolded, but...
Mistress turned around and pushed her ass into my face as she started playing with my cock again, allowing me to breathe in the musky scent of her ass. I know better than to lick her ass without permission but she knew that being so close would just increase my want for it.
She turned around again and straddled my face, ordering me to lick her pussy. A few seconds later she moved down the bed and sank down onto my cock, riding it for maybe thirty seconds or so before getting off again. It felt so good being inside her again, it seems like forever, although it's probably a couple of weeks or so, I'm not too sure.

Using your cock as a dildo, for my pleasure.

Mistress R continued teasing me with her fingers, her pussy and her mouth, occasionally reminding me that my cock really belonged to her now and that she was just using it like a dildo for her pleasure. I love it when she says these things. After riding my cock again she knelt at the side of me and then stroked my cock before offering her fingers one by one to my mouth to lick clean.
"You love the taste of my pussy juice don't you... and you can probably taste your cock a little bit too can't you?" She said.
I could indeed.
"And you love that too don't you?"
Of course I do.
Mistress straddled my face again and then moved down the bed once more, I felt her grasp my hard cock and start rubbing it against herself.
"I rubbing your cock against my ass now slave," she whispered, filling my mind with all sorts of images and thoughts that I know will never be allowed in reality.
"Now I'm rubbing it against my pussy slave, which one do you like the most?"
I could think of no sensible answer and answered that I didn't know.
Mistress laughed and said that was a good answer, since I wouldn't want to be forced to choose between them.

If you didn't have the blindfold on you could see my ass.

She straddled my face once again for another licking and then I felt her turn around and mount me again, this time facing away from me. It feels really different this way, more intense and I could feel my balls starting to tighten as I neared the edge.
"If you didn't have the blindfold on right now, you could look down and see my gorgeous ass as I ride your cock," she said. I would loved to have seen that, it seems a long time since I was allowed that pleasure.
She dismounted again and gave my cock some more slaps (there was a lot of lovely slapping today) and a gentle one to my balls too (all that's needed when you're in the cocksling I can assure you), before attaching clothes pins to my nipples and inserting a dildo in my asshole. She grabbed the hairbrush off the bedside table and dragged it all over my cock, which was a lot more effective than it has been in the past I thought, probably because the cocksling was pulling skin tight, I'm not sure if I'm glad she didn't use it on my balls or not...
Then she left me alone for a few minutes, while my cock recovered from the edge it had sustained while she rode it.
When she came back she plucked the clothes pegs off of my nipples, withdrew the dildo from my ass and released me from my restraints.
"Kneel on the bed and take your cocksling off," she said as she added a few extra pillows to the bed and lay back on them, her silky smooth thighs spread wide presenting me with my first real view of her delicious pussy. Earlier she had been wearing a PVC skirt, but now she was completely naked except for a black bra and the key pendant that I bought for her to celebrate our first year of male chastity. She looked so amazing, I couldn't wait to make her cum.
At her instruction I started gently kissng around her pussy and as she responded to my touch I gently licked her pussy, slowly adding one finger at a time until I had three fingers inside her. At first Mistress seemed to be responding very well but then it seemed to go a little quiet and I started to get a little worried. But fortunately it wasn't much longer before Mistress bucked against my tongue and I felt so happy then, I absolutely hate it when Mistress doesn't cum properly (or at all), thankfully that hardly ever happens these days.

I am going to allow you to cum, but only if you can cum by the time I count to ten.

I licked my fingers clean of Mistress's juices, but that aside there was rather unusually little more to clean up, either on the PVC sheet or on Mistress herself, which was a tiny bit disappointing. Still, it was much more important that Mistress had a satisfying cum, that was all I wanted out of this session, anything else was a bonus.
Soon Mistress had me back on my back again and she stroked and slapped my cock until it was nice and hard (even without the Cocksling). Then she straddled me and lowered her ass to my mouth once again, in the past she has denied me the opportunity to lick her but still teased me as she stroked my cock so I still wasn't sure that she was going to let me worship her, especially since I had confessed to seven illegal touches.
But no, this time Mistress was obviously feeling lenient (perhaps the relief of her orgasm put her in a good mood?) and she told me that she was going to allow me to lick her ass. I stuck out my tongue and started to gently lick her puckered hole as she continued stroking my cock, harder now, suggesting that she was going to let me cum, but who knows?
Before long Mistress R told me that she was going to allow me to cum, but only if I came before she counted to ten, otherwise I would have to wait a very long time. I'd love to say that it was a close run thing, but in truth, I was already holding back and Mistress R's 'threat' (combined with the pleasure of rimming her ass) was making that even harder. I would love for her to play those kind of games in the future, especially if she said she would let go at '1' no matter what, even if I was already cumming. So fucking hot....
I think I started to cum about '8', if not before and it became extremely intense extremely quickly. I've read where other people have said that their first orgasm after a long wait is almost too intense to really enjoy properly and that the second one is much better, but I've never really experienced that for myself before. This time though, straight away I was bucking very hard, but lacked the presence of mind to just ask Mistress R to stop pumping my cock, which I know she would have done had I asked her.
Don't misunderstand, it was still great to finally be allowed to cum, of course... but the weird thing is that, over the last year or so (and I'm sure plenty of others will back me up on this) the actual orgasm itself, long awaited and desired as it may be, isn't really the most important thing to me any more. As much as I love to cum, I think I love to be to stroked, slapped, scratched, sucked, ridden, facefucked, teased and denied even more. If orgasm control teaches you anything it is that you should appreciate the whole experience rather than just the last five seconds, and if the last five seconds were just a little bit too intense, that certainly didn't affect the other 59 minutes and 55 seconds.
Besides, the most important thing for me today was to make sure Mistress R came, and she did. After that I wanted to worship her ass, her pussy, her feet, all more than I wanted to cum. I love and worship  her so much that I would have willingly surrendered my orgasm to her just for the opportunity to see her laying on the bed with her gorgeous legs spread and her beautiful, wet pussy waiting for my tongue, and I got way more than that today.
Yes indeed, I am a happy subbie right now, and I can't wait for next month's session!!!

'Chastity' or 'Erotic Sexual Denial'...

Dr Blasphemy wrote...

"I don't see a point in counting the number of orgasms in a chastity lifestyle. Mathematically the limit of male orgasms, in a chastity lifestyle should be zero when female orgasms tend to infinity. Its my firm opinion that rather than counting female orgasms care should be taken to make it best one. What do you say?"

I suppose, if we take it to the logical extreme then yes, but I don't think you'll find many men practicing chastity who are never having orgasms ever. Most might fantasize about the idea, and many even go months between orgasms, but very few actually are practicing permanent denial. 

Thinking that all men who want to have their orgasms controlled automatically want to forego their orgasms forever is about as credible as thinking that all men who crave chastity also want to be cuckolded. Not so. I am willing to accept neither and yet I am still willing to have my orgasms controlled by Mistress R. 

In the same way, not every man who craves chastity play wants a full-time Femdom relationship, a Female Led Relationship or to be dressed in sissy clothing. Thinking that is about as stupid as thinking that all gay men are paedophiles (why do parents think that gay teachers are more likely to want to 'touch' their children?).

My reason for counting orgasms was purely personal entertainment value, but also to see the 'difference' in the numbers. I'm not 100% sure what 'chastity' actually means...  I can't seem to find a relevant definition, especially since the meanings of chastity and celibacy seem to have become confused over time. Just try searching the web for definitions and you'll see what I mean.

For some people 'chastity' still seems to mean 'refraining from any sexual activity' (which is obviously not what I want...) hence the confusion when men broach the subject of 'chastity' with their wives. I'm struggling to find where chastity is actually described as having sex without orgasm, perhaps I'm looking in the wrong places? Perhaps there should be a new 'name' for what it is that people like me do? Or perhaps it already exists as 'Erotic Sexual Denial'? 

As for Dr Blasphemy's assertion that care should be taken to ensure that every orgasm Mistress R enjoys is as good as possible, well on that score we are in complete agreement.

Ho-hum....

So I had my root canal done mid-day on Monday and have been feeling crap ever since. Was hoping to give Mistress R another lovely orgasm last night, but I seriously underestimated the ache I would be experiencing in my mouth... not pleasant. I wish the dentist would have just pulled the damned tooth out like I suggested in the first place, especially since it's right at the back, I wasn't gonna miss it! Still I guess he couldn't charge £500 for that! So now he's given me some antibiotics to fight the infection (which made my stupid tooth feel loose).
Our next Femdom session is supposed to be on Saturday, so really if I don't feel better by tomorrow night it's unlikely that there will be any pussy worship before then... I'm already feeling deprived and a little depressed!
Bah!!!
I'm also getting a little tired of eating soup... well, actually that's not strictly true, in fact this experience has rekindled somewhat my love of chicken soup, even if it does make your pee smell like chicken soup (that's fucking weird isn't it, the only other thing that does that is garlic as far as I know... and asparagus, although I've never eaten it so I wouldn't know), it's a pity Ben and Jerry's doesn't have the same effect.

While I'm in a moany mood, I have to say the new blogger interface sucks balls. At first I thought they were going to let us use the old one, but apparently it's going to disappear soon so we'll be forced to use the new one. What utter bastards. Oh well I suppose we'll get used to it (we'll bloody have to won't we!).

Work is insane at the moment, which leaves little time for posting, writing or creating captions, but I'm trying to find time, actually I spent a good few hours of my holiday last week finishing up my first selection of Fruity Loops, which basically just proved to me that I've got a long way to go to become as proficient at making electronic music as I am at metal/rock music... still I'll keep trying. I'm slowly getting into more and more electro-bands, like Voicians, The Luna Sequence and Paul Udarov, all great stuff.

Hmm, well that's about it. Sorry there wasn't more sex stuff in this post... hopefully that will be rectified sooner rather than later!

Impatient...

Since we decided to postpone the Femdom session until next Saturday, that meant it was high time Mistress R was taken care of. So this afternoon we retired to the bedroom for some long overdue pussy worship. Mistress stroked my cock a few times as we kissed before pushing me down between her legs, allowing me the first scent of her gorgeous pussy in several days.
I breathed in deeply, savouring her beautiful scent, she smelt so sexy I just wanted to dive right in, but I kept my cool and peppered her silky smooth inner thighs with kisses. This seemed to make Mistress a little impatient and as soon as I started to gently lick her pussy lips she was pushing her pussy into my face, wanting more stimulation.
Gradually I stepped it up, until eventually I felt the tell-tale muscle spasms and knew that she was rapidly approaching her climax. I love that moment, knowing that any second now she's going to be bucking against my tongue.... it's just awesome.
Finally Mistress came and I licked my pussy juice sodden fingers clean (as I always do, never waste a drop!) before she had me lay down beside her and we started to kiss passionately as she started stroking my cock to it's full hardness. It was a very hot teasing session, but I never really thought Mistress R was going to let me cum, and indeed she didn't. Afterwards she asked me how long it will have been next Saturday (25 days) and what was my record again (35 days), so who knows if I'll even get to cum then?
I have noticed my cock hasn't been as hard lately as it was, that's because I've been eating bad things and not doing enough exercise. For that reason I am really looking forward to getting my shit together from tomorrow, it's no coincidence that a few weeks ago Mistress R and I were both eating healthily and doing lots of exercise and we were having sex a lot and my cock was harder too. Also, considering it's been nineteen days now, I don't feel all that desperate, probably because my libido is taking a hit...  and I would much rather be throbbing and desperate frankly.
Ah well that's okay, I'll be hitting my Reebox Z8 treadmill pretty much every day from now on, and using the weight bench too. I'd like a rowing machine too, but I don't really want to buy one until a) we have our conservatory built so I can get it in the garage, and b) I'm certain it's gonna get used enough.
I always find that the key to maintaining enthusiasm for exercising is to ensure you have the right music to hand, and just lately I can't get enough of Celldweller. I have the live album on my iPod and I must've listened to it at least thirty times in recent weeks. I'm sure very few if any of you will have heard of Celldweller, although you might have heard their music in games or as incidental music on TV. Not that it's my place to go recommending music, or that you should really give two hoots what I like or don't like, but dammit I'm gonna post a Celldweller video anyway.

Session postponed until next weekend....

Last night Mistress R and I were in a hotel, the same hotel we stayed in last April actually, where I got a lovely blowjob and was allowed to cum.... not this time though. We had a nice day in Bristol (apart from my stupid car breaking down in a multi-storey car park!) but we didn't get to the hotel until after 9pm and we were both pretty whacked so we just lay on the bed watching Graham Norton interview someone called Nikki Minge or something, never heard of her... she has eleven million followers on Twitter apparently (so what she has to say must be, like, re-ally important?). They played one of her videos on the show and I have to say I'm not into rap, but this was like the kind of rap an eight year old might come up with....
But I digress, the important part was that Mistress R was very softly rubbing my cock through my boxers for about ten minutes as we watched this programme. Initially I started to get hard, but like I said I was pretty whacked and I knew it wasn't going to lead to anything more significant so my cock just kinda stayed semi-hard as she stroked it. It felt kind of nice, but I was a little disappointed that my cock wasn't throbbing... too much good food and not enough sleep in the last couple of days I'm sure.
Oddly, after she stopped stroking me I moved down the bed and reached under her (my actually) T-shirt and played with her gorgeous breasts for a little while before slipping under the covers and kissing her stomach and the tops of her beautiful thighs, that got a little bit more blood pumping to the old cock... but by this time we were both ready to go to sleep.
Today we took a trip to Cheddar Gorge and then a diversion to a big shopping centre before coming home, we arrived back in the door about 3pm and have been waiting for bedtime ever since really, well I have. Thursday neither of us slept well and last night we slept better but not great. And so we've decided to put our Femdom session back a week, when we'll both be feeling much fitter, slimmer and better rested.
Which isn't to say that Mistress R won't be getting some attention tomorrow though....
:)

The time it is approaching....

Today is Thursday, which means that Mistress R and I have got three more days left of our holiday, well actually I've got four because I'm off on Monday too... but since I'll be having a root canal, I think it's safe to say the holiday will be over by Sunday night! It's been good, with Mistress enjoying three lovely orgasms so far and our Femdom session still to come on Sunday morning (fingers crossed). But after that I'm afraid it's diet time again...
We have a family wedding to attend in July and my suit just doesn't really fit. I could buy a bigger suit of course, but that isn't the answer is it? I'd like to buy a smaller suit if anything... so things need to happen, and fast.
In preparation, I've sorted out the garage so that I can treadmill, bike and do weights without falling over things and we've started recording Biggest Loser USA so that we can watch it next week as motivation. I don't know if you've seen Biggest Loser USA, but they have a trainer called Jillian Michaels who is the perfect submissive males fantasy trainer...

Can you imagine giving her the keys to your chastity belt? 

CBT? Hell she'd probably use your nut-sack as a speed-ball just for laughs!

And can you imagine the pegging she'd give you? You wouldn't sit down for a month!

Incidentally, I didn't add the words "Because I said so that's why" to that photo, it wasn't fuelling some uber-Domme fitness-Goddess fantasy, that's just her reason to exist.

I wonder how many of you are already typing 'Jillian Michaels' into Google images?
Hahahahahahahaha.

So, from next week we'll both be watching what we eat and working out, which will be good and will soon have us both feeling great. The only thing I am going to miss (even more than chocolate) is those late night teasing sessions when Mistress R has had a few glasses of wine... I hope she can find a way to let her inner 'evil-pixie' out, otherwise this could be a long three months.

The fiction of Arthur Mitchell...

A while ago I received an email from a guy called Arthur Mitchell asking if I would be interested in reading one of the stories he had written and was selling on Amazon. Now I don't have a Kindle, or any kind of electronic reader come to that, but Arthur was kind enough to send me a PDF file containing the story 'Breeding Lisa with Big Black Cock'. Now I'm sure you can pretty much draw your own conclusions from that title, and indeed, mixed race cuckolding is what it's all about. It's very well written (I wasn't aware but Arthur tells me that Amazon is flooded with very shoddy porn-writers) albeit rather short, it's more of a short story than a book in it's own right... which to me makes it a little expensive, but I can understand why Arthur priced it as he did since as he said, if you charge 99p people will automatically assume it's garbage.
Anyway, if you would like to read one of Arthur's stories, you can find them on Amazon.com and if you click the link (here) then it will take you straight to the page you need.

And now it's a hundred....

Mistress R now has 124 orgasms to my 24... in just over twelve months. She had a very hard, long orgasm this afternoon on my tongue, before slapping and stroking me some more... that'll be it until Sunday I guess, unless she decides she wants another one tomorrow?

Nearly 100 up on me already...

Another lovely hard orgasm for Mistress R yesterday afternoon, after which she rode my cock for several minutes before getting off and giving my wet cock a few nice stingy slaps so she could get me throbbing hard before she called time... probably be one more chance to make her cum tomorrow and then that'll probably be it until our Femdom session on Sunday!
Don't know if anyone's noticed but Mistress R is nearly 100 orgasms up on me already!

The best a man can get....

Yesterday was Mistress R's birthday, so after a long day at work we headed out to a local restaurant for dinner (after Mistress opened her presents of course). We were quite full when we came home but after a couple of hours we managed to sample a small slice of the birthday cake I had made for Mistress, and after a couple of more hours, just after midnight, I had to go to bed.
Mistress R stayed up reading and drinking and I have no idea what time it was when she came to bed, I don't even remember her coming to bed, which is unusual because even if I've been to sleep I usually wake up when Mistress comes upstairs and I'm usually laying there waiting for her, hoping for a little teasing.
Well this was different, because I don't remember any of that, but I do remember (almost certainly) the best teasing I've ever had... I kid you not. I don't know why these late night/early hours of the morning sessions are so hot, I imagine it's because we are both totally relaxed and chilled out, and a little wine definitely brings out Mistress R's 'evil' side (perhaps I should put her on an intravenous drip?).
I can honestly say Mistress had me in a state of perfect, wonderful frustration. She stroked and slapped my cock, teased the head with her fingertip and squeezed my balls.... it was awesome. Truly awesome. Once or twice I was so close to coming I was genuinely concerned I wasn't going to be able to stop it, especially as I was so dozy, the resolution to control it was very hard to muster, but thankfully, somehow  I just about managed it.
I think when Mistress comes to bed late like this, she seems to leave her worries about hurting me behind a little bit, and instead she simply responds to my groans and movements more, so the cock slapping was a little harder and so, so good. I really wanted her to slap my balls harder too, because I love that when I'm really, really turned on... cock slapping is always fun, and so is gentle ball slapping, but harder slaps to the balls are only fun if I'm going insane with lust for my Mistress (like I was last night).
Mmmm, that's the second Mistress R birthday in a row where I've had all the fun, but I will definitely be adding to Mistress R's orgasm total today...

Mistress R commented this morning that she really thought I was going to explode last night... or that I would 'ask to be allowed to cum'. Hmm, I thought that wasn't allowed!!!

Harry Haversackers makes a good point...

On his inimitable blog (here) Harry Haversackers makes mention of my new poll and why he voted yes. He also brought my attention to an important point though.... and one which I hadn't fully thought through it must be said. He took teasing to mean just that, so potentially no penetration whatsoever! Hmmm, just as well I haven't voted yet, I don't know if I could deal with that...

New Poll...

Finally a new poll for you, see the right hand column for details.

My mistake...

As Miss Christina has rightly pointed out to me via email, I still have one chance left to 'ask' to be touched, since in January 2012 Mistress R reduced my chances from 3 to 2, not 2 to 1 as I had thought. It's been so long since I used one that I really had forgotten... thanks Miss C!

Order is restored...

After a whole week without anything to report (save a very brief bit of teasing on Friday night), order has finally been restored, along with Mistress R's 5-1 orgasm ratio!
It felt so good to finally taste her beautiful (and heavily trimmed) pussy again and to make her cum nice and hard, before she began teasing me in earnest. It seems so long ago that I'd actually forgotten about the slapping, so it was a lovely surprise when it happened.... needless to say it made me very hard indeed!
Mmmm, lovely.
I'm afraid I did do something I don't usually do though, I asked Mistress R to stroke me a little more after she'd said that was it. But I am still allowed 'one ask' between orgasms, so it wasn't completely out of order...
Now that we're back on track I'm just looking forward to giving Mistress R as many orgasms as possible during the rest of the month. This being the first month of the new chastity year, for the first time we have a year-on-year target of eight to beat, I'm sure that's easily achievable.
:)

A whole week!!!

A whole damned week without an orgasm for Mistress and only about two minutes of teasing for me, we got to sort this out tonight for sure.

Everyone should read this...

http://roberto4538.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/width510-height400-srchttpxhamster.html

Ever had a vibrator/dildo up your ass that didn't have a base on it? You won't do that again once you've read this poor guy's story...

Oooooooooooooh...

I see yesterday the blog made it to 600,000 hits! With the 130,000 on the caption one we would have been heading for 750,000 if the blog hadn't been split in two. Which reminds me, I've been thinking about merging the two blogs again, because as I believe I have said a few times over the last few months, my job is changing and soon I will not have the time or opportunity to post on the blog during the day. Consequently my posting rate is likely to decrease and my time for making captions will decrease even more. So given that the number of captions is likely to fall significantly, perhaps it wouldn't hurt to have just one blog again....?

Gardening...

Well, I've been quiet for a few days I know... sorry about that. Not really a lot to tell, since Mistress R has been on her period so nothing much has happened except for about 2 minutes of teasing very late on Friday night. In fact the last couple of days we've been sorting the garden out (so middle aged!), which means digging and gravelling, consequently I'm a bit stiff (and not in a good way). Never mind, all being well tomorrow things will pick up again and Mistress R will be adding to her tally of orgasms. With only five days since my last one it's more than doubtful that I will be doing the same.
Hope you've all had a good Easter and you haven't eaten too many eggs, I haven't even had one yet!

Oh yeah...

One more thing I forgot to mention earlier, was that afterwards when Mistress and I were laying together she told me that she'd been tempted to drag it out longer, and leave me on the edge a while longer while she asked me if I really wanted to cum for her... but for some reason she decided not to. I'm too happy to be disappointed about this obviously, and besides, I'm sure this bodes well for the future.
When we started our second year of chastity I told Mistress that I hoped she would be 'crueler' this year. I would love for her to let her 'evil' side out more and more, I know she has it, I can see in her face how much it pleases her to watch me struggle to remain in control as I wait for permission to cum and she always has a big grin on her face when she tells me that my teasing is over for the night and my cock is throbbing hard, twitching in the air, desperate for a few more strokes or slaps...
I would love for her to really torment me like that, to leave me hanging longer while she toys with me or maybe convinces me that she's going to let me cum and then stop me right at the very last second. Just thinking about that makes my cock ache...
:)

Even if you have to eat it all out of me afterwards...

This evening has been pretty bloody amazing, to say the least. Mistress and I convened in the bedroom around 9pm, me kneeling up on the end of the bed as usual, waiting for her to lay back in front of me. Mistress climbed onto the bed and opened her legs slightly, allowing me just a glimpse of her beautiful pussy. She beckoned me forward and I moved between her legs and leaned in to kiss her as she lay back fully onto the pillows.
After a short time Mistress reached down and stroked my cock until it was fully hard. I groaned a little as she stroked me and seemed to be pulling me towards her. I shifted forward slightly, and pressed forward hoping to rub my cock against Mistress's beautiful pussy. Almost as soon as I did this Mistress put her hand on my chest as if she was going to push me away and then tell me to go down on her.
But she stopped and then we kissed a little more before she rubbed the tip of my cock against her, teasing me until I groaned some more. I knew that any second now she would push me back and I would have to endure my throbbing cock pressing into the mattress as I worshipped her gorgeous pussy. But this time I was wrong...
After a few seconds more, Mistress R pushed me back and told me to lick my fingers, I obeyed and without further instruction began to gently stroke her pussy lips, now starting to believe she was going to let me inside her. After a few moments she pulled my cock towards her and guided it into her moist pussy. She was a little too upright really but we managed to get my cock in and it felt wonderful to be inside her again, and judging from her reaction it felt pretty amazing for her too.
We fell into a nice rhythm before I lifted Mistress's legs and started to worship her beautiful feet as my cock slid in and out over and over. I started to speed up, without really thinking about it and Mistress told me to slow down. I complied and even then I soon had to stop for a moment before continuing, with seventeen days of cum inside me I was never going to be able to fuck Mistress like I would truly like to have done, but Mistress didn't seem to mind.
I love the look Mistress gives me when she's watching me struggling not to shoot without permission, it's so hot. Kind of a horny amusement, knowing how bad I must want it and that she can stop me at any moment if that's what she chooses to do. She knows I won't complain or go against her wishes. I adore being under her control and if Mistress chose to stop me one second from coming I would comply immediately.
Then Mistress surprised and delighted me by moving onto her side before moving her left leg between mine and her right over so that she was lying on her side with her upper leg bent at the waist. We used to use this position all the time before we started the chastity and after my ED period I would generally have to wear a cock ring to have sex in this position. Not today. My cock stayed hard and I gently fucked Mistress's gorgeous pussy as she lay there on her side, looking gorgeous with the cutest smile on her face.
I always loved this position because I am crazy about Mistress R's ass, it drives me nuts and I always used to gently part her cheeks so that I could see her pretty, pink hole as I fucked her. I so wanted to do that today, but I knew that if I did I would cum instantly, as it was I was hanging, if not quite yet by a thread, by something only marginally more substantial.
Mistress was loving this, she always loved this position and after a little while longer she moaned a little and asked me a question.
"Do you want to be allowed to cum?" She said.
Struggling to focus, I took a second or two to answer.
"Only if it pleases you Mistress."
She smiled broadly at my response, before adding.
"Even if you have to eat it all out of me afterwards?"
Jesus.... I nearly, so very nearly came inside her right then, permission or not. I was barely moving now, so fucking close that any significant movement of my hips would start a chain reaction that no willpower would prevent reaching it's conclusion.
"Yes Mistress," I groaned.
"Cum then," she said.
Barely had the words left her mouth and I started to pump my cock into her sopping wet cunt. It took less than five seconds I should think before the first stream of cum erupted from my cock. I continued to fuck her silky, smooth hole until I couldn't take any more and my seventeen days were finally over.
By the time I had pulled out, Mistress had moved back onto her back and I had manoeuvred myself down between her open thighs there was a good half inch of cum oozing out of her gorgeous pussy. It looked so erotic, I love to see her pussy like that, it's so beautiful to me.
Without a second thought I licked the cum from her and continued to clean her pink and swollen pussy until all the cum I could reach was gone. Mistress started to relax and soon I was adding a finger to her delicious pussy and eventually brought her to a lovely orgasm.
It's rare for me to cum inside Mistress like that and then clean her pussy with her on her back, and even rarer to continue without stopping until she reaches her own orgasm. I loved it of course, my only slight regret being that the delicate scent of her beautiful pussy that I love to inhale when I first move to go down on her was overpowered by the slightly stronger smell of my cum as it dripped out of her, but I'm sure it won't be long until I get to breathe in that delicious scent once more and days like this are to be savoured for the truly special moments they are.
I loved being able to penetrate Mistress R with her on her side like that, she looks so good in that position, her bent leg only emphasising the curve of her beautiful ass. I just wish I could have sneaked a peek at her tight little hole, but I know it would have pushed me over the edge, I just know it would. Hopefully Mistress R will allow me to penetrate her like that again soon, maybe not too long after she has allowed me to cum, so that I will not be quite so desperate to cum. Or maybe she'd prefer me to be desperate, maybe she'll be the one who slowly parts her ass cheeks to show me the part of her that she knows I long to worship, but am only rarely allowed to....
I hope so.
Like many women, I suspect, Mistress R still doesn't fully appreciate the effect she has on me. If only she knew how easy it really is to make me putty in her hands. I loved it when she said 'Even if you have to eat it out of me afterwards?' That was just so unbelievably hot, and yet she seemed mildly amused afterwards that her comment had had such an effect on me.
During our sessions, Mistress likes to tease me about making me worship her pussy at a moments notice, the minute I came in from work or such-like, I like to hope that one day in the not too distant future she will realise just how willing to serve her I am and take that confidence and run with it. I would love nothing more than for her to kick off her shoes and tell me to worship her beautiful feet or for her to have me kiss her pussy and breathe in her beautiful scent as she lay back on the sofa, even if she didn't want to cum, just for me to show my appreciation for her gorgeous body in whatever way she chose.
I believe that having the confidence to do this just once would open the way for her to really know how it feels to be worshipped like a Goddess and to gain the confidence to demand my worship whenever it pleased her to receive it. I know it must be difficult to take that step, but I hope that one day Mistress R will do just that, knowing that if she does I will obey without hesitation.

New story added...

A new story (Eating Cum from Kimberley) has been added to my Literotica tab (top of the page).

I came across this earlier today...

I wasn't looking for a contract myself, but I know that some of you maybe would like something like this and while it may not be exactly what you are looking for it might provide something of a template which you could customise for your own personal requirements...

wife-husband-cuckold-contract

The honour system...

I meant to go back to this in my earlier post... so it's been a year now on the 'honour system', and of course I haven't managed to completely keep my hands off my cock, but I have managed not to make myself cum, which is quite amazing really. The way I see it, yes I could if I wanted to and I could probably get away with it, but if I did then what is the point of all this? I asked for this so I have to hold up my end of the deal.

This afternoon, after I had made Mistress R cum and she had teased my cock some more, she told me she wanted me to try harder to keep my hands of my cock this year. I will try, but... well, you know.

Happy New Chastity Year...

Who would have thought a year ago, that I would be sitting down here this morning to write about my first full year in chastity? The funny thing is, I never thought that far ahead, I really didn't. I knew I wanted to do this, but I never contemplated what that would mean for the long term. I guess it seemed so unlikely that Mistress R would want to carry on indefinitely, given her reservations at the start, that I didn't really think it was worth worrying about. And yet here we are, twelve months later starting our second year of male chastity...incredible!
Yesterday I presented Mistress R with a key pendant that I found in our favourite online jewellery store, I wanted to get her something to celebrate our first 'chastity' anniversary when I clicked on the 'What's New' tab I couldn't believe my eyes. Right there was the perfect gift at the perfect time, gift buying has never been so easy. I have searched for a key pendant before, but actually gave up because I couldn't find anything suitable, so this was such a result...
Mistress R wants me to take a photo of her wearing it, so I think my header will be refreshed with a new picture, which will also maybe help to stop some of the confusion for new readers who see that and think I am locked in a chastity device (I'm still on the honour system, which I have found easier than expected, but more on that later).

Even though it seemed like the perfect gift, I was still concerned that when it arrived it wouldn't look as good as the picture suggested, and I wasn't sure about the charm-bracelet type attachment that fixes the key to the chain either, but when it arrived the next day I was totally stoked at how good it looked.

Mistress R loves it too, she still has no intention of locking me up, indeed she really doesn't understand why anyone would want to be locked up, but she still loves the symbolic nature of her wearing 'my' key, she loves that only we know what it means (well, us and all you guys, obviously!). 

Mistress and I discussed our arrangement a few times this last couple of days, firstly she sought reassurance that I was happy to continue as we are and I assured her that I did. Last night I sought the same assurance from her, because I was a little concerned that maybe with the blog and everything, she might feel like she was 'trapped' in this role now, and I don't want her to feel that way.

I reminded her that she could stop this at any time if she wanted to, but Mistress R insisted that she didn't want to go back. We've discussed this before and Mistress R pretty much said to me 'Why would I want to go back to feeling obliged to have sex when I wasn't in the mood?'. She actually said something about staring at the ceiling and then quickly retracted that comment!!! (Just thought I'd slip that in for you humiliation junkies, hahaha).

On a more positive note, she said that leaving aside everything else, the simple fact that my cock is now hard whenever she wants it is worth continuing for alone. I can't argue with that, any guy who's experienced ED for any length of time will know how stressful it is for both partners, and a vicious circle to boot, one that's very difficult to break, even if the problem is mostly mental. Additionally, because Mistress R is now more comfortable about only having sex when she wants to (and because she knows my cock will be throbbing hard for her), she is more relaxed about it and actually seems to want it more, which is a win-win situation if ever I saw one!

Which is not to say that I get to be inside her more of course...

Long time readers will remember that when I first suggested 24/7 chastity, Mistress R stipulated that if this was what I really wanted then she would decide when penetrative sex would happen (this was the same day that she forbid me to even 'ask' to be allowed to cum, even just to hear her say 'no'). In the beginning I believe it was something of a hangover from the bad-old ED days, because even a year ago my cock wasn't the ultra-reliable monolith of flesh it is today and this way I guess Mistress R could ascertain the 'quality' of erection she was dealing with before she consented to penetration (thereby avoiding any stressful failures and breaking that awful circle of doubt and disappointment). 

There was more to it than that of course, and I was slightly thrown by the disparity between the amount of  penetration that I thought Mistress R would require and the actual amount of penetration that she decided upon. Eventually this sorted itself out, and lately it seems that Mistress R wants me inside her more than she used to, if not always for very long. The other change is that nearly every time I am allowed to penetrate Mistress R, she is always on top. Which I have always loved, being a naturally sexually submissive person. Indeed I think I have only been on top three or possibly four times in the last year... most recently this concluded in one of the most intense orgasms I have ever had when Mistress R finally 'persuaded' me to use the orgasm voucher she gave me for Valentines Day.

As we were discussing things last night, I mentioned to Mistress R that one of the things I loved about her getting to chose when we have penetrative sex was that it seemed more 'special' now, she agreed and said that she loved that we had broken out of the 'routine' of intercourse, and said that sometimes after I've made her cum she just gets the urge to feel my cock inside her, and because she decides when she knows she can always have what she wants, and I'll always be ready, willing and able!

While Mistress R still isn't what some of you might wish for as a dream Domme, she certainly has gained a lot of confidence over the last year and she's made me extremely happy in the process. This was never going to be the beginning of a 24/7 Femdom Marriage, or an FLR. I am not a slut for pain or humiliation and submitting to Mistress R once a month is enough for me... well, I mean I wouldn't mind if it was more often, obviously. In fact if Mistress R wanted to whip me, strap-on me,  ride my face and have me worship her feet every week then you certainly wouldn't find me moaning about it. But once a month is enough to keep me from feeling 'neglected'. Who knows what the future may bring in that respect. We did talk about stopping our Femdom sessions at one point, and for Mistress R to 'use' me as and when she wanted, but I'm glad we didn't do that in the end, I think that having the session ensures that things 'happen' regularly. And I'm not sure that would have happened without it, at least not yet.

Looking forward I could see the possibilities of that happening. As Mistress R's confidence has grown she has become more relaxed about slapping my cock and balls as an everyday thing, maybe in the future paddling my ass or using a 'strap-on' on me as and when she feels like it might become the 'norm'...

A few months ago I ran a poll asking 'How Many Times Do You Think Mistress R will let me cum in 2012, the winning answer with a whopping 52% of the vote was 'Less than 10'. Given that I've been allowed to cum five times in the first three months of the year, I think that's somewhat unlikely, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was less than twenty. On average over the last six months I have been allowed to cum 1.6 times per month, and if we extrapolate that over the next twelve months it works out to just over nineteen orgasms for me in 2012. But who's to say that Mistress R won't be cutting back on my orgasms (though she might just as likely allow me more, if that's what pleases her...).

Certainly my first year total of twenty three was skewed by April's count of four orgasms (yes, four!), a number that hasn't even been approached since (twos and ones ever since) as Mistress R has relaxed into her role and tightened her grip on my orgasm quota. I wouldn't be at all surprised if this year see's my first orgasm-less 'calendar' month, after all I've already had a 35 day stretch without an orgasm.

Interestingly, April was also Mistress R's lowest orgasm scoring month, just eight! Ever since it's been nines, tens, elevens and twelves all the way. I would love for Mistress to regularly be hitting teens in the coming year, but of course that's not for me to decide, all I can do is provide top quality pussy worship whenever requested.

Between us, Mistress R and I amassed a total of 140 orgasms in our first chastity year, with 117 (83.5%)  for Mistress and a generous 23 (16.5%) for me. But if we take April out of the equation, it's a different story, with Mistress scoring 109 to my 19, which means that Mistress took just over 85% all for herself. 

Either way Mistress has had at least five orgasms for every one of mine and (ignoring April) by the end of the year it was heading towards a ratio of 6-1.

So there we are, today is the first day of the next year of male chastity for us and hopefully later on today I will be allowed to worship Mistress R's beautiful pussy and we'll start as we mean to go on, with Mistress R satisfied and me left throbbing and horny. Or maybe she'll let me cum? Mistress did talk about letting me cum one more time last night, before the new year started, but for whatever reason she decided not to. But then she also talked about making me wait until our next session (at least another two weeks away) or maybe even longer... after all, I'm sure she's going to want to beat my thirty five day record sooner or later...

:)

Elsewhere it's been an interesting year, if not as productive as I'd hoped on the writing front. Attempting to write that Femdom Cave book backfired on me somewhat, leaving me with 22,000 words of story that I have no real interest in finishing (perhaps I shall just post it here as it is), and really crippled my enjoyment of writing for some time. On a more positive note, the revelation that I can write stories for sale on Amazon to Kindle owners has piqued my interest once again and hopefully I will soon begin doing just that! The Femdom Cave experience did force me to start writing in the third person though, which is definitely a step forward, but I won't be writing stories to anyone else's parameters again any time soon. People often say that hobbies are best kept as hobbies, once I started writing that book it became like a second job, and I'd rather write what I want for fun... but if I can write what I want and sell it through Amazon then that's going to be brilliant!

I think I'm done with reviewing sex toys too. Plenty of other blogs are doing it now, and it was always a bit of a pain in the arse to be honest. Most sex toys to me are a waste of time, once you get past the obviously useful ones (dildo, strap-on, vibrators, whips, paddles etc) you're pretty much into the land of the expensive novelty item. And I'll tell you straight, nothing would make me want to use a masturbation sleeve again, it was just fucking weird. I did enjoy reviewing the books though...

Right well that's it for now, I'm off to make a cup of tea and watch some NHRA drag racing on YouTube. In a world where 'youth' is everything it's deeply satisfying (to anyone the wrong side of forty, like what I am) to see a 62 year old mad bloke more than holding his own at 300mph!