Read a fantastic post this afternoon on the 'Male Chastity Lifestyle Forum' (which is open to people who have bought Sarah Jameson's book 'Be Careful What You Wish For'). It was quite a long and detailed post relating the authors lengthy realisation (over twenty plus years) that he craved to be controlled and denied by his wife. It all started with a story he read in a magazine when he was seventeen, about a guy who finds photos of his wife sucking another man's cock. He confronts her about the photo's, but admits that it turns him on and she sucks him off before telling him she's going to do it again the next day and get him some more photo's.
This led the author to think that he craved being cuckolded, but when it actually happened to him (with a girlfriend before he was married) he found that he didn't get the satisfaction from it that he thought he would, but yet he would still fantasize about it... which left him very confused. I'm sure a lot of us can relate to this, I know I can. I sometimes worry that Mistress R could easily get the impression that I desperately want her to cuckold me, considering my writing and the captions I have made recently, but I definitely don't... and even if I did I know damn well that I couldn't cope with it. So I for one totally understand where this guy is coming from (he later mentions that he now realises that he knows he couldn't cope with being cucked by his now wife of twenty years).
Eventually he came to realise that what actually turned him on about the story wasn't the fact that the woman had cuckolded the guy, but it was the fact that she was going to go and do it again the next day, knowing that her husband would be staying at home waiting for her. Or to put it another way, it was the fact that the woman was going to be getting pleasure while the guy was waiting and not getting any - sound familiar? Once he recognised his fantasy for what it really was, the cuckolding part of it diminished significantly and he eventually came clean to his wife about his chastity fantasy and is now very much enjoying being kept chaste by his wife for weeks at a time (tellingly, although he had waited so long before telling his wife, she didn't think it was all that 'kinky', and so now he feels foolish for waiting so long, and wasting literally years when he could have been living the way he wanted to).
Because he also feels that 'touching his cock' is 'cheating' and because he wants her to have total control of his cock they are currently moving towards using a CB-6000 to make sure that he can't touch his cock unless she allows it. As my regular readers will know, I understand this very well, as I continue to fail quite badly at the no touching thing, even though I am quite proud of myself for managing to resist making myself cum for, oooh 24 days now... which is why I continue to be frustrated at the seemingly hopeless dream of being locked properly.
Anyway, that's a separate matter... what really struck me about this whole piece was how much I 'got' what this guy was saying, and how much I relate to it. When I write stories or make captions about cuckolding it's not that I want Mistress R to have sex with someone else, it's simply that I want Mistress R to have all the pleasure while denying me mine. Mistress R knows full well that if she wanted me to I would literally go down on her every single night. Nothing makes me happier than making her cum, especially if she teases me and doesn't let me cum, so it stands to reason that cuckolding fantasies would work along the same lines (she's getting all the pleasure, etc etc), it's just making the fantasy bigger isn't it. How many times do you read cuckolding fantasies where the wife suddenly allows her 'bull' to take her anally, even though he's (obviously) hung like a horse and she's never shown the slightest inclination before? Again it's playing to the same fantasy only once again it's upping the ante, now it's not just 'I get all the pleasure', it's also 'not only do I get all the pleasure but he gets the pleasure I would never allow you'.
I'm not suggesting that all cuckold fantasists feel the same way, I'm sure a lot of them are just into watching their wives fuck someone else and seeing another cock pentrate and give pleasure to their wives, or they actually like the thought of their wife cheating on them. But for those of us who feel a bit confused by the contradiction between our fantasies and our real feelings it makes a lot of sense...
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