I may have said this before but...

I got an email from Femdom Cave this morning and I clicked the link to check out what was new in the literary world. But, inevitably it seems, I came away disappointed. Now, this isn't the first time and in the past I've shied away from writing about it because it sounds like the ramblings of an unpublished author (which they are, but please bear with me!). I'm not going to be specific about it because it's by no means a problem with one author or publisher, but damn... does anyone write erotica without sounding like they've swallowed a fucking dictionary?
I get that writing about a subject with a limited descriptive scope can become repetitive if the same words are used over and over again, but that's not really what I'm getting at. It's the general style... it's almost as though authors feel that they are writing about a subject which is inherently inferior (because it's porn) so they go out of their way to write in a style which they feel imbues it with a certain level of gravitas, but in the process (to me at least) they stifle the 'horniness' of the text they are writing.
Okay, so you need something a little more intellectual than 'Pete rammed his thick cock into Sarah's cunt until it exploded inside her' if you are going to sustain a novel, but 'Lord Peter Fortesque-Smyth unsheathed his rampant sword and speared it between the quivering lips of the overcome Lady Patricia until they erupted together like a previously dormant volcano' is just annoying, silly and most of all not remotely horny.
Okay, I know some people must get off on that style but I just don't get it, and it's not just a man thing either because Mistress R wouldn't touch that stuff with a bargepole.
So why is it that so many of the books published seem to be in that style?
I've had plenty of negative comments about my writing over the years but it's always been about content, I've never had one negative comment about style, which tells me that a lot of people like it, and let's not forget 'Owned' has had over 170,000 views on Literotica. There are of course some books written in a down to earth style, Alex Jordaine's books are worth a read, especially the earlier ones, but overwhelmingly (as I now realise I have commented before) published erotica is just a little too flowery and unbelievable (private islands, helicopters, 5000 square foot private dungeons etc...). The thing is if it's not believable then how do you invest in it?
And what is it with the names as well, there's a book on Amazon called 'Cuckold' which I read, and it wasn't too bad but for the fact that the guy's wife is called Desdemona. No, really. Simply changing her name to 'Jane' would have made the book 10% better.