That "conflict" has been one of the hardest things for me to explain to my wife as we get kinkier and kinkier. Not enjoying an act (ruined orgasm, spanking, etc) during the moment, but looking back and remembering it as very erotic as well as looking forward to the next act as erotic. It is that pain/frustration as enjoyable/not enjoyable that is amazing to me as a submissive.
Firstly Tim, thanks for taking the time to leave a comment, all of us bloggers really appreciate when we get feedback like this, it stops us feeling like we are talking to the walls... especially when the comment is insightful and reinforces my own experiences...
Right now I don't think Mistress R quite 'gets' it as far as ruined orgasms go, but then there was probably a time she didn't understand why I would willingly submit to having clothes pegs on my nipples and you should see the glint in her eye now when she pulls them off and makes me flinch... she certainly didn't 'get' chastity when I first tried to introduce it, and every now and then I do ask her if she is still okay with living this way and she's quite convincing when she says she can't see any reason why she would ever want to go back to how it used to be.
So with that in mind I have every reason to think that given time, practice and familiarity Mistress will eventually come to really enjoy watching me suffer in this particular way for her, just as I can tell her attitude to paddling my ass has changed... when we bought the paddle I remember her saying to me "Are you sure you want that, I think it's going to hurt!", but now there's no disguising the effect using it on me has on her pussy.
Slapping my cock and balls was another thing that she used to be reluctant to do, but now it's a very regular and very enjoyable part of our sex life, she's still a little hesitant about slapping my balls, but that's probably not a bad thing.
I'm sure one day in the not too distant future Mistress will lull me into thinking that I'm going to be allowed to cum properly and then right at the last second she will snatch it away from me, maybe she'll simply let go of my cock at the last second or maybe if she's riding my cock she'll just lift herself off me at the crucial moment and let my poor cock pulse my cum onto my stomach...
I'm sure in that moment the frustration will be enormous and I'll probably question my own sanity, but at the end of the day, the thought of Mistress controlling every last orgasm I'll ever have and having her be the one to decide 'ruined' or 'pleasurable' every single time is just so overwhelmingly hot... well, it makes every frustrating pulse worth it.
