Fuck yes!

Three hundred down...

Well would you look at that, Mistress R now has 366 orgasms to my 66, making me exactly three hundred down in just over three years! Actually, as I'm typing this I can still taste Mistress R's delicious pussy... and that's not all I can taste either. No I haven't been allowed to cum again, but after some pleading I was allowed to worship Mistress's gorgeous ass as she teased my cock. Truth be told I was throbbing before I even brought up the subject of being allowed to lick her asshole, so you can imagine how I felt after being given permission!
Well, it's Easter weekend at last and I'm looking forward to four days off work. I can't really claim to need a holiday as I've only just had one, but all the same, these last four days have seemed like the longest on record. Aside from all the fun things Mistress and I are intending to do together, I am hopeful of spending at least some time being creative this weekend. That means either writing music or writing porn, and I feel like the latter would be the better option. I already have an idea for a short story, so perhaps by Monday night you guys will get to read it. Well let's hope so anyway.
I actually looked at a couple of Literotica stories today and they were really poor. I mean, really poor. I actually left a comment on one because it started off promisingly enough, quite well written actually, but then it all went to pot. First the guy was a lawyer, then a former NFL player, then his cock was smaller than his wife's ex, then he was really well hung... I mean, for fucks sake! Mistress can't even abide punctuation misdemeanours (woe betide the author who brandishes a semi-colon inappropriately) so I can't imagine what she'd make of that.
Anyway, here's wishing all my readers a happy Easter.

Mistress Marie's comment on my Femdom Session post...

Mistress Marie said: Another fun session to read about. Hey did you ever share the details of the new weight loss program you two are doing and what the rewards etc are?

No I didn't actually. Basically what happened was the group changed venues and the new venue was bigger and the seats there were really uncomfortable to sit on for an hour and a half. So I ended up just going to get weighed and I was fine with that, until the last week I went. I had been weighing myself at home and wasn't expecting much, maybe a pound, or half a pound off, maybe at the worst a maintain. But instead they told me I had put on four pounds and I was really pissed off. Mistress R didn't believe it either, so I thought, the only reason to go (and pay £5 a week) was because they were supposed to have really good scales that I could rely on, but that totally killed that trust I had in them. So Mistress R and I decided that instead I would put that £5 a week in a jar and we can use it to go out for dinner or something when there's enough in the pot.
So now basically Mistress R is weighing me every weekend and every time I lose 'new' weight I get to choose a treat. If you remember, last week I chose the cock whip, which was great. Unfortunately, this week I put on two pounds (we've been off work this week, although I was still expecting to maintain) so I didn't get to choose anything, and tomorrow is Mistress R's birthday so it's not looking brilliant for next week either... but still, I'm still about 2.5St (35lbs) lighter than when I first went to Slimming World and it was cool today being able to buy some cool new Oakley T-Shirts in the Oakley Vault. There's also some milestone rewards, but I'm not sure exactly what they are going to be yet, so we'll see.


Wonder if you can choose a good hard long ass fucking sometime :) That would be very hot indeed.

Yes, I've thought about that. But since I only get to choose one treat (or rather toy) at a time, I'd really rather have the glass butt plug first for a while. Maybe I need to discuss this with Mistress R to clarify...


I was thinking one night when you are done worshipping her feet, she could have you stroke while she watches and then make you ruin your own orgasm over her feet and suck them clean. Maybe making you actually do it will alleviate some of her feeling mean!

Thanks for this suggestion MM, I have read it out to her and she commented that it was an 'interesting idea'. I do love cumming on her feet (and licking them clean), and to be honest it would be easier for me to ruin myself onto her feet than for her to do it, getting my cum on her feet while she's stroking me has always been a bit tricky, lets hope Mistress follows this idea up soon!

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Not much to report since the session if I'm honest. Mistress and I were away Friday and Saturday, a concert and a shopping trip meant two very exhausting days. I'm pleased to say that I didn't neglect my foot worship duties yesterday though, and I kissed her pretty feet for quite a while as she lay on the hotel bed yesterday! Right now Mistress has a bit of a problem with one of her eyes, I hope it doesn't spoil her birthday tomorrow.

The end of year three...

And so we come to the final day of our third year, as predicted Mistress R did indeed cum again and I did not (just as it should be). So Mistress finished on 132 orgasms for the year (just over eleven a month on average), which is a significant increase on the last two years. I on the other hand slipped a little further, down to twenty for the year (versus 23 and 22 for the last two years), although of course this year I was allowed an additional six ruined orgasms (not shown on the graphs).

Mistress R averages 10 orgasms a month to my 1.8 (over the full three years)

This second graph is a lot more revealing than the first of course. It shows for instance that only three times in three years have I been permitted to orgasm more than twice in a calendar month. I'm surprised that there has only been one single month where I wasn't allowed to cum at all, and that was nearly two years ago, I am hopeful that with the advent of our fourth year Mistress will start ruining me a lot more and letting me cum properly much less.

Tonight was a bit of a struggle, I was constantly getting close and thinking about warning her, but never actually needed to. By the end of my teasing session my cock was throbbing like hell I can tell you. Totally amazing! 

Tomorrow our new contract comes into force, we're not having any kind of ceremony or anything, since it's not like this is something new to us, we are simply affirming the rules that were already in place (in writing) and adding a few to help things run smoothly. Since this will be the first day that I have to kiss Mistress's feet everyday, there's a chance that there could be some foot worship, and Mistress has already hinted that we might celebrate our new contract with some more pussy worship. Sounds good to me!

Nearly there...

Work on the 'contract' has progressed well, we are nearly there, it's really just the weight loss reward details we need to finalise now. My first weigh in with Mistress R was on Saturday morning and I lost 4lbs, it's too complicated to try and work out what the total lost is now because there's two different scales etc etc... suffice it to say, on our scales I weigh 212lbs right now, I think I weighed about 240 when I started Slimming World and a couple of years ago I was 253. So it's pretty good overall, but we've decided to just start over with 212 as my new starting weight.
We are intending to have a reward for weight lost, but changed slightly before to encourage bigger losses each week. It's going to be something like 1-2lbs off I get to choose a toy to play with, then 3+ I get to choose a toy and something else. And then there will still be half stone and full stone rewards, if I remember correctly...
Our anniversary is coming quickly now, just a few more days to go. Mistress enjoyed a lovely orgasm on my tongue earlier tonight and I enjoyed some very hot teasing afterwards. You know sometimes I look at our orgasm page and I kind of find it hard to believe just how few times I have been allowed to cum this last three years. And how many times Mistress R has cum. 359 plays 65!
That's 5.52 orgasms for every one of mine, and nearly 300 more than me in three years! Could be very nearly 300 by Monday night as well, I very much doubt I will be coming again before next month... but I'm sure Mistress R will be!

An answer to Jim's comment...

A couple of days ago this comment was left on my blog:

I'm curious to know some things. Do you feel that you are where you thought you'd be nearly three years down the road? Your blog is called a chastity and femdom blog, yet you aren't actually in proper chastity and there isn't really that much femdom on your blog either. I'm wondering if you thought things would be a lot more advanced by now? I do like your blog and your stories are great any more coming up? Thanks, Jim

Firstly I'll address the last part. Hopefully there will be more stories Jim, if I can stop procrastinating and get on with them! As to your other questions, well...

Do I feel that I am where I thought I would be now, three years ago?

To be honest, I had no idea where this would lead...it never really occurred to me that we could still be doing this without any breaks three years later. It still kind of surprises me now, mainly because Mistress R wasn't exactly what you'd call enthusiastic about it to start with. So in all honesty I can't really answer that...

Your blog is called a chastity and Femdom blog. yet you aren't actually in proper chastity and there isn't really that much Femdom on your blog either.

I presume that by 'proper' chastity, you mean I'm not locked up in a device. And you're right I'm not, but Mistress still decides when I cum so as far as I'm concerned that is chastity all the same. I have given control of my orgasms to someone else, and while it's true that there's nothing physically stopping me cheating, you might be surprised how much harder it is than you'd think to break that promise.
To be honest, while the idea of being locked up really appeals, the reality seems so much hassle. I know there are these very expensive, very comfortable, made to measure steel products, but it seems to me that you have to really, really want to go down that route. And I wouldn't for one second try to argue that the honour system is just the same, because even I can see that it is isn't. Occasionally I might read a post somewhere else (maybe Denying Thumper) and feel a slight pang of jealousy that I'm not really getting the full blown experience, but at the same time I consider myself lucky to have had and continue to have the experience that I am having. 
Without a doubt, being physically prevented from experiencing pleasure and knowing that your key-holder literally holds the key to your cock must be something quite incredible, and if Mistress ever came around to the idea then I would be more than happy to try it, but I just don't think it's likely and I can't quite see the point in resenting it. I can understand why it would be extremely erotic for both partners, it must be an amazing rush for a woman to have the key to her lover's cock around her neck, knowing that he is horny and desperate to feel the slightest touch on his cock, but at the same time I have severe doubts about comfort and practicality. In any case, while I can see what you are saying, the fact remains that I haven't cum without Mistress's permission for nearly three years, how is that not proper chastity?

I will concede that there isn't a massive amount of Femdom on my blog. This is is one area where things haven't perhaps developed as I might have liked them to.

I'm wondering if you thought things would be a lot more advanced by now?

Again I didn't really think that far ahead. On the face of it though, if you look at last month's Femdom session and one from three years ago, they haven't changed all that much. But then we'd been doing those sessions for nearly ten years before I started the blog so we'd already worked out a lot of what worked for us and what didn't. I do sometimes wish our sessions were longer though because so many times they seem to be over before Mistress has done half the things I'd like her to do, it does frustrate me that sometimes I can go several months between using a particular toy. 
Mistress might counter that by saying that I can request any toy when I lose new weight, and that's a good point... but then it's not really the same because I will tend to chose 'nice' things, like worshipping her ass, or having her use the glass butt plug on me or letting me watch her play with her glass dildo. That's not the same as her deciding to whip me, paddle me or strap-on me simply because she wants to (and the last part of that sentence is the important part). 
I had hoped by now that we might be at a point where Mistress would feel comfortable initiating random acts of Femdom between sessions, there has been some very occasional foot worship and there has been a fair amount of ass worship (which I love, although strangely now I don't really see it as a particularly Femdom thing because I really love doing it) but very little else. But then Mistress is not a 'random' kind of person, she likes to plan and to know exactly what she's doing, which is why the fixed sessions work well for her. 
Perhaps it would behove me, now that I am getting back on track with my weight loss, to try and chose more 'Femdom' toys to play with between sessions, like the cock whip, paddle or crop. Maybe it would help her to get used to using those items away from the adrenalin rush of the structured session and lead to more 'random' Femdom in the future?

A contract would be good...

I've been thinking for some time that it would be useful for Mistress and I to have some kind of written contract. It may seem a little strange to go that route now, after nearly three years... but I do find it difficult to remember every detail and Mistress doesn't seem to always remember the rules she makes exactly either. Sometimes I think the only person who does know our rules to the letter is Mistress Marie!
I think I shall talk to Mistress R and see if I can't get a written agreement drafted, maybe it would help inspire her to think of some more rules for me too. I don't think there are that many rules really, but when Mistress instigates a new rule I often forget it has been changed or set up. I know that...

• I am not allowed to touch my cock without permission.
• Obviously I am not allowed to make myself cum.
• I may ask Mistress if I can touch my cock, and she may either give me permission to do so or will touch my cock herself.
• I am not allowed to ask Mistress for permission to cum.
• Initially I wasn't allowed to request penetration, but Mistress did relax this rule recently, albeit she said that if I used it too often she may rescind it, I can't remember if I have asked her yet or not. I try not too, since I want it to be her decision.
• Mistress can instigate teasing, penetration or any form of body worship whenever she pleases. She can also order me to tease myself for her amusement at any time. 
• Mistress can allow me to orgasm, deny me or ruin me as she sees fit.

There must be more than that, I think I need to sit down with her and get a definitive list!

Interview with Stanley Jeffries (Marcus Andrews)...

Earlier this year I received an email from a reader who invited me to check out the writings of a friend of his. Truth be told I wasn't exactly… umm, enthused… since most of the things I have been sent to review (particularly e-books... there's a reason some of these things can't get published properly, said the bitter and twisted would-be author...) have been less than entirely brilliant.

This, thankfully, was a different story. In fact I damn near did my eyes in trying to read the PDF on my Nexus 7 (damned tiny writing!) such was my eagerness to read on. The book (or rather books) in question was the 'Journey Into Chastity' trilogy and a finer tale of twisted fucked-up-ness you would be hard pushed to locate.

Having almost blinded myself reading the blessed thing, I reported back to the reader that I thought the book was fantastic and he put me in touch with the author 'Stanley Jeffries'. Stanley then kindly sent me the paperback version of the 'Journey Into Chastity' trilogy (if only I'd had that instead of that effing PDF file!) along with another book (The Slow Seduction of Claire MacDonald) which he had written under another name 'Marcus Andrews'. So I guess my first question is why did you write the books under different names?

SJ: Good question, because you would think an author would want to build as much recognition of his or her work as possible.  But it was publisher, Pink Flamingo, who suggested that I keep the Stanley Jeffries name for FemDom stories, and use a different name for MaleDom.  Apparently readers of erotic fiction like to be clear about exactly what they’ll be getting, which made sense to me. I’m an equal opportunity pervert, so I’m turned on by both genres.

RA: I'd like to start with the book you wrote under the name ‘Marcus Andrews’ if I could, mainly because it's fresher in my mind (I've literally just finished it). It's written in an interesting way, with two stories being told alternately and eventually joining up (though I must admit that bit confused me a little...until you straightened it out for me), what made you decide to tell it like that and did you find it easy to write like that? Did you write all of one story first or did you write it pretty much as the book goes?

SJ: I’d written an earlier story, The Chastity Game (FemDom), as an even more complex intertwining of timelines and viewpoints.  I still think The Chastity Game is the best story I’ve written, and so the Slow Seduction I think I wanted to try to recapture that mechanism. But it can be hard to do…you need to keep a lot of stuff straight in your head – and as you pointed out it doesn’t always come over as easy to understand!

  

RA: I was quite taken aback when I first received the book, by the harshness of some of it, I guess I should have expected it to be quite harsh given what happens in the 'Journey Into Chastity' trilogy, I think what did it was I flicked it open at a page where one of the main female characters was having her head held under water... I guess it was partly that the character was female that made me feel a little uneasy, though I must say the scene bothered me less when I read it as part of the whole story. 

SJ: Guilty as charged.  There’s definitely some strong stuff in those two stories you’ve read. But actually some of my other stories aren’t as extreme.  Karl’s Year in Chastity, and The Chastity Game are both more balanced. By the way, I think one of the reasons you might find some scenes to be extreme is that I try to create storylines that could actually happen. I actually don’t read a lot of erotic fiction myself because I tend to find that authors need to create alternate realities.  Like some parallel universe where women are totally dominant, and men are sent to “re-education camps” to be trained as submissive slaves.  Of course there’s a place for that kind of thing, but when those scenes become extreme we’re not as shocked because we know it’s a fantasy.

RA: In all seriousness, I hate those kind of books…

SJ: In the Slow Seduction book, the hero is a young guy (I think he’s twenty four) called Tony.  He gets involved with his mother’s best friend, Rebecca, and initially she wants to dominate him.  But he wants none of that, and turns the tables on her in quite an extreme way.  In the Rebecca timeline, Tony sometimes does extreme things to her, but she keeps coming back for more.  The other thing is that I tried to explore the fact that characters can’t be nice all the time.  Sometimes they make mistakes, or do things they regret.  The head under the water scene is one of those…and it’s at a point where Tony knows that his time with Rebecca is coming to an end.  As you say, hopefully the scene makes sense in context.

The alternating chapters tell the other half of the story – which is where Tony meets Claire and falls in love with her.  That part of the story is far more gentle…because Tony takes a young and innocent girl and introduces her to his lifestyle.

RA: In the book the main male character instigates some pretty harsh punishments on various females, but he also displays immense common sense and concern for sane practices, for example he is outraged when one of the women is caned to the point where she could potentially have been left scarred for life. Do you think it's important to try and instil a sense of responsibility in the reader who might one day want to try his hand at administering erotic punishments?

SJ: Very much so.  This is partly to do with the fact I mentioned just now – that my stories are set in a “real world”.  We all have to remember that BDSM has to be Safe, Sane and Consensual. Obviously as writers we don’t want to go all “preachy”, but I think if it fits into the story then why not throw in some advice at the same time? If you think about it there’s a lot of quite extreme stuff on the web these days.  Studios like Mood Pictures (for MaleDom), or Cruel Amazons (for FemDom) show material that’s not just incredibly extreme, but could also be illegal under the UK’s new definitions of extreme pornography. If people use those movies as some kind of guide for their own S&M activities then that would be a huge mistake.  It’s one thing to use those images for sexual arousal, but a totally different thing when you come to put it into practice. So maybe a bit of social responsibility in erotic fiction is a good thing.

RA: Both the books I've read of yours feature electro-torture quite heavily, is that something you've had a lot of experience with?

SJ: A fair bit – most of it on the receiving end, and all of it extremely mild.  My favorite toy is the Tazapper.  The thing I love about it is that it’s totally safe.  It’s a battery-powered device that generates a static electric zap – a bit like touching a door handle if you’ve walked across a synthetic carpet, except a lot more powerful. There’s no intensity dial on a Tazapper – it’s just all the same level of zap each time.  So the way you control the pain is by choosing the location of the zap (nipples are my favorite), and the rate of zapping.  If you combine it with the helplessness of bondage it can be pretty intense.   It’s really easy to control a scene like that with the usual safe words (“mercy” = “that’s my limit”, and “red” = “stop and talk properly”).

I’d like to try other electrical stuff, but the BDSM-style electro equipment can be pretty expensive.  I’ve seen electric dog collars used in various ways – the most extreme being when they’d wrapped around a submissive male’s scrotum. Again – that kind of activity looks fun in the porn movies, but you need to be so careful with the power levels. Obviously pain has to play a part, but at the end of the day it’s also supposed to be safe, and fun for both parties.  So right now we stick to the trusty Tazapper.

RA: Are your characters based on people you know or are they purely products of your imagination?

SJ: It’s a mixture, actually.  If you use people you know then it saves a lot of time because you don’t have to build a detailed character profile. In the first part of Journey I based the characters on a girl I was engaged to, and it’s very, very, VERY loosely based on some real stuff that happened.  It was way less interesting in real life!

If I meet certain people, sometimes there’s just something about them that makes me want to use them as characters. For the character of Gemma in The Chastity Game I used Rachel Riley, who is a hostess on a UK TV game show called Countdown.  She’s utterly gorgeous, but she has this “girl next door” quality to her that I find enchanting.  As she’s as smart as fuck too!

There’s a UK comedian called Jimmy Carr.  Some of you reading this will know that he’s done a few spoof shows “8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown”, and he’s worked with Rachel Riley on those shows.  On his latest stand-up comedy DVD he says this…“As some of you will know, I’ve had the chance to work with Rachel Riley recently, and I’m often asked if she’s as pretty in real life as she seems on TV.  Let me put it like this…I would crawl naked across broken glass to suck the cock of the last guy who fucked her.”

One of the things I always have to do when I’m developing characters is to “fall in love” with my main female character. In Journey into Chastity I had four female characters: Laura, Christine, Angie, and Louise.  Laura and Christine were based on girls I’d known (Laura was my ex-fiancee).  Angie was invented, but Louise sprang out of a TV weather girl called Lisa Burke.  Lisa is a Cambridge graduate in Natural Sciences (First Class Honors), and she’d lyrically beautiful.  But she has an even more beautiful voice.  I remember listening to her do a weather forecast and just melting as she spoke.

Lisa Burke

Obviously the trilogy was a very long story, but at various stages I had to evolve my own personal feelings for them.  It’s one of the things I really like about the creative process.

RA: Going back to the 'Journey Into Chastity' trilogy, I obviously read it pretty much all in one go, but it was written as three separate books, what was the timescale of the creative process for that?

SJ: Flipping ages!  Each book is over a hundred thousand words.  I’m guessing it took at least a couple of years. As you know from reading it, there’s a humongous plot swing in Book Three, and because I’d published Book One already it took a lot of work to make sure I didn’t go off the rails and become inconsistent.

RA: Again there are two really rather nasty scenes in that book, one involving electro-torture and the other involving a blunted woodworking tool. Are you fucked up in the head or what?

SJ: You nailed it, yes!  I really should be locked up.  Preferably in a special chastity hospital where the nurses all dress in black leather and…wait a second…don’t get me started! The thing is that the male character in the Journey trilogy, John, is a serious masochist.  And the two girls who dominate him sort of get a bit carried away.  In some ways it highlights one of the issues of a BDSM relationship, because we do get really excited when we’re in the scene.  The endorphins start flowing, and we can take all sorts of pain. Then the next morning we wake up and think “what the fuck did I do?”. But you’re right…some of the stuff was pretty extreme.  People seem to like it though...

RA: I must say, despite my own better judgement I continued reading enthusiastically... that tells me something about your writing skills, wouldn't you agree?

SJ: Now I’m blushing. But I think as a reader sometimes you have to plough through some painful bits of a book to make progress on the plot. Equally as an author there are times I think “for goodness’ sake I’m really not enjoying writing this bit, but I need the story to move from one place to another, and this is the only way I can do it”. I remember reading Lord of the Rings as a kid, and there were a lot of bits of those books that were hard going.  But you come out at the end really enjoying it.

RA: Does writing that kind of extreme scene get your own juices flowing, or are you just trying to shock the reader? 

SJ: I get very turned on when I’m writing, absolutely. It’s interesting you ask if I’m trying to shock the reader.  I never really thought about that.  In fact, come to think of it I’m not sure I really consider the reader when I’m writing – how fucked up is that?

RA: Did you encounter any problems with your publisher regarding the severity of the content of the book or were they pretty relaxed about it all?

SJ: Things have changed a lot now that the religious right have got so much power in the US.  In the real world I work for a US company and those poor sods have got to be so careful in their day to day work. I was lucky that most of my books sneaked in before the latest series of bans by Amazon.  But I was a bit surprised when Fiona at Pink Flamingo told me that the Slow Seduction book wouldn’t be able to go on their main site – and it’d have to be listed on a more extreme site. In a way that was a wake up call for me, because I’m honestly not trying to write extreme stuff.  I’m quite a nice chap really…honestly!

RA: I know you are working on a new book and you are trying to make it a bit less extreme, how's that going so far?

SJ: It’s going really well.  I’ve written about 120,000 words – of course it doesn’t mean they’re “good words”, but it does tell me that I really need to stop creating more story and focus on making the story that’s already there better, and more consistent. It’s a FemDom story, and is told from the viewpoint of a Romanian woman who’s basically fallen on some tough times, and who needs to find a way to survive and help her family.  She’s twenty four…she’s beautiful, and smart.  I love writing strong female characters, and I also love creating dominant women who truly love the men they dominate.  Here’s the summary text I’ve written for the back page cover…

“People in difficult situations sometimes have to take drastic action, which was how business graduate, Alina Florian, found herself sitting with a group of other pretty young girls waiting in a sports hall in her home town of Bucharest for the chance to be interviewed as a candidate for a modeling agency.  She understood all too well what “modeling” might entail, but right now she was too desperate to be proud.

What she didn’t expect was the offer to become the wife, and full time Dominatrix, of English inventor and millionaire, Charles Waddington.  The deal she was offered was simple; five years of her life in exchange for financial security forever for Alina and her family.

Taking the biggest risk of her life, Alina decided to go through with the deal, and embarked not only in this rather strange marriage, but also on an MBA course in a prestigious English business school.

Alina’s life was certainly transformed beyond her expectations.  Still confused by the luxury her husband’s wealth could buy her, she begins to feel a strange attraction to her submissive slave.  She discovers a love of physical domination, including sexual tease and denial, and enforced male chastity.  Gradually her husband’s gentleness and devotion begins to win her over, despite the temptation she encounters from her new best friend, Rachel.  But Alina also has to deal with her own turbulent past, and confront personal demons in her quest for happiness.

In his latest FemDom novel, Stanley Jeffries explores the possibility that money really might be able to buy love…as long as that love is earned through total devotion and suffering. The story includes scenes of intense verbal and physical Female Domination, and a gradual escalation of that dominance within a loving, and highly consensual relationship.”

I actually don’t have a title for it yet, but “The Alina Story” as I call it at the moment, really is a love story. It’s also the first time I’ve deliberately sought feedback on the story as it developed – and you’ve been a massive help there, Rob. The problem is that, even if I finish it soon, it tends to take ages for it to be published.  Pink Flamingo has a big queue of stories, and I suppose they only have so much capacity to turn out the final finished books.

RA: I notice you have a couple more books listed on Amazon (Karl's Year in Chastity and The Chastity Game) are they available as paperbacks?

SJ: Interestingly both of these are a lot less extreme than either Journey or Slow Seduction. Karl’s Year in Chastity is available as a paperback, and I would have sent you a copy if I’d still got one.  Authors are sent five copies of their books for “promotional” purposes (we don’t get the ebooks, oddly enough).

RA: I’m sure you would, I guess I’ll just have to stump up for it myself! :)

 SJ: About a year ago I’d taken my last copy of Karl’s Year in Chastity to give to a pal of mine.  We were down in London in a bar, and the book was sitting on the bar between us.  There was a really cute Italian girl serving us, and she picked it up and asked about it.  So over the next hour or so she kept coming back over to talk to us for a couple of minutes each time, and I was explaining how she needed to lock her boyfriend in chastity to get him under control.  We kept the whole thing very, very polite and low key, and to our amazement the girl was really starting to get into the idea.  At first we just assumed she was being nice to get a tip, but she kept asking sensible questions and coming back over to read bits of the book between serving other people. It was the middle of the week, and the bar was in the City of London, so everybody had gone home by then and the bar was almost empty, so she had plenty of spare time. The next thing is that the girl brought her two female colleagues over, and she starts explaining to them how they could change their men for the better!  They weren’t quite as into the idea, needless to say...

RA: Their loss. 

SJ: If you haven’t been to a pub in London lately, they are almost always staffed by Eastern European immigrants (they used to be staffed by Australians, but that phase seems to have passed).  As I said, our girl was Italian – I know Italy’s not in Eastern Europe, but the other two girls were from Hungary.  They were all in their early twenties, and my mate was loving it (he’d recently split up with his wife). So instead of giving him the book, I gave it to the Italian girl – along with my email address, of course.  I wanted her to tell me if it worked on her boyfriend!  Sadly this is the real world, and she never sent me an email.

RA: C'est la vie…

SJ: The Chastity Game is only available as an e-book, I’m afraid.  At the time I wrote it, Pink Flamingo were overwhelmed with other manuscripts and so I asked if they just wanted to publish it as an ebook. I’ve got to agree with you – real books are still better!  And I’m particularly annoyed that The Chastity Game isn’t available as a real paperback because I think it’s my best story overall.  I’m hopelessly in love with the character of Gemma in that book (big sigh).

RA: Well Stanley, thank you very much for taking the time to answer my questions and giving me some insight into your creative process, it's much appreciated and I very much look forward to reading your new book when it's ready for release!

Visit Stanley Jeffries' author page at Pink Flamingo HERE

Buy Stanley Jeffries' books on Amazon.co.uk HERE

Buy Marcus Andrews' book on Amazon.co.uk HERE

Buy Stanley Jeffries' books on Amazon.com HERE

Buy Marcus Andrews' book on Amazon.com HERE

The hill...

Having read some of my recent comments (and those of Eric M), Mistress was asking me about the post-orgasm slump I mentioned. I think the hill analogy is a really good one. You start at the bottom of the hill on day one, and each day you climb a little higher, the air gets thinner and you feel a little more 'dizzy' every day until you cum and then you have the adrenalin rush of the slide back to the bottom.
As things progress and you get higher up the hill, you start to feel the dizzy buzz more and more and though you want the rush to the bottom (which equally is getting more exciting as you start from higher up each time) you also start to wonder if you really want to be back at the bottom of the hill, is the high speed rush of the slide worth the slog to get back to where the buzz begins.
And then at some point (for me it's about 35 days) you realise that at higher altitudes the lack of oxygen in the air makes you feel crazy good and though you might turn around and look down the hill and think, 'Wow, look at that, it would feel amazing to slide down there right now', there's this little voice on your shoulder which tells you that, 'Yes it will be an awesome ride... but it's over really, really quick and look how long it took you to get here, wouldn't you rather stay here and keep feeling that buzz, don't you want to keep moving up the hill and get more of that crazy good feeling?'
And then on your other shoulder there's another (slightly weaker) voice saying... 'You know you want to take the ride, think how good it's going to feel to fly down that hill, yes you'll have to start your climb again, but you'll soon start to feel the buzz again.'
To which the other voice counters, 'Yeah, but in the time it's going to take you to get back here, you could have been way up there...' and so it goes on and on and on.
I do think that there comes a point actually where one single orgasm doesn't completely empty the tank, or rather take you all the way to the bottom of the hill... I've noticed this recently, like there's some kind of cumulative effect of all these denial periods one after another. I mean I haven't had any 'breaks' since we started this (nor do I want any) and sometimes it surprises me after being allowed to cum how soon I start to feel properly horny again. Of course you are still nearer the bottom than you would be if you hadn't cum, but it's not quite as bad as feeling like you are right down there on the flat grass before you even take your first step on the hill.
I've read this before actually, where people say that the first orgasm is so violent that it's almost ruined because it's too intense to really enjoy properly. I can understand that, sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't and it doesn't seem entirely dependent on the length of time waited either.
Which is why although it sounds a little bit crazy I can totally understand the appeal of permanent denial, I'm not sure it's possible without a device no matter how strong willed you might think you are. But if you can go months and months (as for instance Harry has) with only ruined orgasms then why not? Years are only months placed one after another at the end of the day.
Day thirty seven today and I'm feeling good. Femdom session tomorrow... will Mistress decide to make me cum?  Do I want to cum? Yes and no... obviously. If she does will she ruin it?

Thirty five days...

So today I have equalled my second longest period of chastity... I need another eight days without cumming to break my record of forty two days. As Mistress said, our Femdom session is on Sunday, and that is often a time when Mistress wants to make me cum whether I want to or not. She has traditionally felt more comfortable having me lick my cum and swallow it during the sessions, although recently she has started to do that more on normal days too... which is great!
I must say, the last few days I have really felt like I am getting right into the zone. I remember last time I got to this point it was quite difficult, but ultimately felt so good being so horny all the time. I really do love it and while my balls are aching to cum, at the same time I'm dreading that post orgasm slump. I'm just glad it's not my decision, my body aches for release but at the same time craves another week or two or three. Sometimes this lifestyle is so wonderfully difficult...

So proud of Mistress R...

Eric M said: I like how you pointed out that you take things more seriously than you should because you want her to take them more serious, I can relate, and often catch myself doing the same thing. The funny thing is, it works, when they see how we take something a little more serious than we should, they slowly condition themselves to understand its importance to us. Good post, and congrats on approaching your record!

Thanks Eric. I can't remember how long it's been since I had a confession to make to Mistress R about touching my cock, but it must be six weeks or more. I don't know what changed. Even a few months ago when I would have to tell Mistress R it was... difficult, but more because I would be trying not to laugh, because it felt weird and silly.
This time was so different, I really felt like I had let my Mistress down. I mean, tonight she read my post from last night and she said I shouldn't worry about it so much and she really didn't think it was the reason why she found it hard to cum. But, she also said that she agreed with what I said about it being important and that especially in a situation like ours trust is paramount. She also said she understood what I meant about having to tell her because she was thinking about letting me go on top.
Of course part of me thinks, damn, you know... you fucked that up for yourself there. But crucially it wasn't telling her that fucked it up, if I hadn't done it in the first place I would have had nothing to confess. 
I was a little afraid that Mistress might think I was totally overreacting and taking it far too seriously, and I'm actually very pleased that she hasn't taken that stance. That would be an easy course to take, since it did rather stifle what was shaping up to be a rather hot sex session...and she commented tonight that I did seem rather stressed about it, so it was obviously quite apparent. But the last thing someone in my position would ever want to hear is 'It's only a game, it really doesn't matter'. 
I thought Mistress handled it really well actually. Of course the obvious thing to do would be to break out the paddle, but actually, riding my cock while telling me how my actions had affected the amount of pleasure I would be receiving was really quite humbling. It was so strange laying there with her riding my cock and feeling that I didn't deserve it. 
Actually I can't think of a better punishment for what I did. On the one hand it was lovely to watch her riding me, but on the other it was as though my body wouldn't really let me take the pleasure from it that I didn't deserve. My cock was rock hard when Mistress got off me, but... you know, it actually made me think of Harry Haversackers and his numbing cream trick, I kind of feel like I experienced something similar - without the cream! At least I enjoyed the slaps afterwards... 
;)
I think if this would have happened six months ago Mistress might have handled it somewhat differently, and it is very encouraging to see that change in her. On reflection it could have been a tricky situation, she rightly wanted to put me at ease because she could see that I was a bit stressed about it, but she didn't cross the line between doing that and undermining our F/m relationship. I have to say I'm very impressed and proud of her right now, she is steadily turning into the Queen I truly wish her to become.

A great post...

Just read a great post on Thumper's blog (HERE) which I'm quite sure you guys all read anyway. If you don't then you should, and in particular this post, because it pretty much hits the nail on the head. In fact if anything it makes me rather glad I'm not locked up in a chastity device, I think if you are then the hassle of taking it off surely means that you get less teasing, and I do NOT want that at all!

It's the absolute dichotomy of it all, isn't it. On the hand you want to be frustrated and almost neglected... but to make that work you need the acknowledgement too. It's like, I know I've mentioned this before - not recently mind you, but there's a chastity story out there on the interwebz that I've come across several times, and it's not really the kind of story you might read for 'relief', if you know what I mean. It actually reads more like the experiences of someone who has genuinely tried to interest his wife in the whole chastity thing, but she just couldn't or wouldn't get it.
The most memorable part was where the couple were arguing about it and the wife said, if you want to be locked up and denied, can't you just lock yourself up and pretend that I'm making you do it?
While I can see her point, it demonstrates a complete lack of understanding about the massive importance of the psychological element of denial. Okay so I'm not locked up and there's physically nothing stopping me from jerking off, even with my balls 32 days full. The only reason I don't is because I want Mistress to be in control, I want her to decide when I get to cum and if I really, really couldn't take it any more I still wouldn't make that decision myself without consulting her because there's no way I could hide it and make like nothing had happened, and I wouldn't want to either.
This is one thing actually I read recently (it might even have been on Thumper's blog actually) about why a chastity device is essential... naturally I disagree, because to my mind this is all about trust. Mistress trusts me not to make myself cum behind her back. If I break that trust then any future chastity would be rendered pointless without a device (and that's not going to happen).
So, apart from the fact that... actually I like being denied and I'm still wanting it to go on longer (albeit I haven't been denied the massive lengths of time that some people have) not only would Mistress be disappointed and very probably rightly upset with me for 'cheating' on our agreement, it would also throw this whole shadow of doubt over any future chastity, because how could she ever trust me again, honestly?
I'm wavering from the point here though (as usual) which is that for chastity to really 'work' the guy must feel that his 'suffering' is not without purpose. I could spend the next hour going around in circles trying to explain exactly what I'm trying to say here, but it would be much quicker and easier to just quote the last sentence of Thumper's post, because that pretty much sums it up perfectly.

I never want Belle to feel sorry for me when I’m like this. I never want her to apologize. I never want her to feel guilty. All I want is for her to tell me she knows what I’m going through and that I’ll keep going through it until such time that she decides she needs it to end. For her to tell me that I’m utterly powerless in this. How my needs are utterly beneath hers. And then I can tell her back how utterly in love I am with her and thank her and let it all burn away at me from inside.

Some comments...

Mistress Marie said: Wasn't there one stretch where you were denied 35 days even??? I thought I remembered one like that. Cause I remember thinking it was 5 weeks even. Then I think the 42 came after that. I could be imagining it though.

Well, yeah I did too... I think maybe I need to check my figures, I was working off the graph I made in April, this one...

Harry Haversackers said: You need a mantra to repeat, Rob, over and over again. Something like: "Horny is good. Horny is good. I need to remain horny...."

I'm sure you've seen me mention it before. At one point, you'll realize that the constant arousal from denial is better than the ever so brief flash of pleasure of an orgasm...

Yes I'm sure you're right Harry, although I do still want to relive the time where I was allowed to masturbate over Mistress R's beautiful feet... like I said, I just wish there was a way of coming properly without ending up back at square one.

29 days...

I could be wrong, but I think I am now into my second longest period of chastity ever. My longest period stretched a wonderful forty two days of course, but by my reckoning the next longest was 28 days, which has happened a few times. It seems I have never had a chastity period terminate in the thirties.
When I woke up this morning my cock was throbbing hard, and as I lay there I wondered if it was up to me what would I do. On the one hand, of course I want cum, but on the other... I really don't. I vaguely remember that around the thirty day mark it became harder to hold back when Mistress was riding me, indeed I seem to remember one night when I couldn't even bear being touched for fear of going off.
But I also remember that phase passed... and how that throbbing ache became so damned enjoyable.
This time is a little different of course because I've had a couple of ruined orgasms, but they don't seem to have made any difference at all.
In all honesty I would be quite happy for Mistress to keep ruining me indefinitely, because although I know that I am probably going to have a massive orgasm one day in the not too distant future, I am really not looking forward to being back at the bottom of the hill.
Looking back on it this last week has been a bit light on the sex front. Mistress has barely touched my cock since she ruined my orgasm last Sunday. Tuesday I made Mistress cum but declined any teasing because we were both so tired and the only action since then was a minute or so of self pleasuring under Mistress's instruction on Wednesday night.
At least we have done most of the things we wanted to do this week now, no more long trips in the car thankfully. Hopefully we will get down to some of the more interesting items on our to do list! We'll see.

Questions from Eric M...

Eric M said: This sounds like an amazing time that the two of you shared. Everything about the experience is every subs dream. She did not leave anything out. The ruined Orgasm, continual edging, riding you, allowing you to worship her ass, and making you lick her finger clean, as well as cleaning up your own cum. It all sounds like a subs dream, of which you were allowed to experience in one day!
I have a few questions for you. Even though this orgasm was ruined, will this start your denial period over, or are you still working towards your 42 day record? If so, in hind sight, do you wish she would have left it alone? You mentioned that your Mistress is becoming more comfortable in her dominance over you and being mean, at what point do you feel that the process of that began, and what do you feel allowed that to happen?
Lastly, you talked about Mistress r teasing you with her mouth, Is that something that she regularly does? Does she enjoy sucking cock in general? The reason i ask is because Miss Jessica will never suck my cock, even as a tease, granted even in our vanilla days it was rare, but now, she wont even consider sucking my little dick, it is not even an option! I was wondering what your take on that was.

Hi Eric, thank you for your questions. Since I definitely did not have anything even remotely close to a  full and satisfying orgasm I would say it was fair to keep counting, so that's.... 25 days now, nearly 26. 
Mistress is becoming more comfortable with being mean, but it is a slow and ongoing process... when did that process begin? I suppose the first time she teased me without allowing me to cum. But that was low level. Although I get frustrated sometimes if I were to create an imaginary graph I'm sure it would be quite obvious that Mistress's comfort level with being mean to me has increased in recent months. After all, over the last few months she has finally accepted ruining my orgasms (which she was totally against for a long time) and slapping my balls has become a regular feature of my teasing.
As for what allowed that to happen, I would say... a lot of patience and reassurance. So the first times she would slap my balls I made sure that she knew I liked it, that I was grateful to her for indulging my fantasy and that I wanted it harder without making her feeling pressurised to rush into doing it. So Mistress has gradually increased the intensity at a rate that she feels comfortable with, to the point that now she will give them a reasonably hard slap without too much of a second thought.
Mistress R has always sucked my cock a fair amount... probably more so since we started chastity. I guess that follows since we don't have as much penetrative sex any more. I think she does enjoy sucking my cock, and who wouldn't (hahahahaha)... I can see why maybe people think she 'shouldn't' since she is the dominant one in the bedroom... but we are not really in what I would call a 'Femdom' relationship so much, as a chastity relationship which sometimes includes Femdom. 
Actually I would suggest that our relationship is defined more by my submissiveness, than  Mistress R's dominance. In that I behave more submissively than a 'normal' guy, but Mistress doesn't really act much more 'dominantly' (day to day) than a normal woman. For instance, I will offer to worship her feet rather than her telling me to do it. I am, I suppose, working towards her having the confidence to behave as dominantly as I am behaving submissively... that would be wonderful!

Eric's blog is HERE

Morning wood...

I woke up throbbing this morning, it's twenty two days since my last proper orgasm and there was a drop of pre-cum on the tip of my cock. I woke up to see my beautiful Mistress still fast asleep and I imagined kissing her awake and then sliding down her warm, smooth body and burying my head between her legs.
Sadly I had to get up and go to work, while Mistress got to lie in...at least I know that I'll be getting to taste her beautiful pussy later on tonight, and then we'll both be on holiday for a week.
My balls feel huge right now, I'd love to be allowed to cum, but at the same time I want to hold on to this wonderful feeling of denial. It's a good thing Mistress decides when I get to cum, if it was up to me I would be finding it extremely hard to resist right now.

Femdom session 27th May 2013...

Sometimes before a Femdom session I get a bit nervous, I know Mistress R does too. Today I was definitely a bit nervous. For one thing I cut it a bit fine getting ready, and was literally lowering my blindfold as Mistress was opening the bedroom door, for another, well...
Mistress has always enjoyed having me write notes for her which she reads before a session. We have found these to be invaluable as a way of communicating about stuff that isn't always the easiest to discuss and mostly for me to let Mistress know what I really liked about our last session and to pass on ideas I've had and... well for me to let her know how amazing she is really!
So anyway, there was a bit I had written after last month's session about how I love licking her juices off her dildo, especially when she teases me about making me suck them off another man's cock. In the next sentence I said about how much I love it when she goes down on me and then kisses me so that I can taste my cock on her breath. Both of these things are true and Mistress knows both of them well by now... and yet seeing them written down next to each like that made me feel strangely anxious. I don't know why...
Anyway, Mistress had instructed me to wear the leather ball splitter toy that I wore a couple of months ago, which is okay, except that if you don't stay hard the whole time it has a tendency to fall off. I can only speculate that my aforementioned nerves were getting the best of me because my cock was very reluctant to get hard even when Mistress had me on my knees worshipping her beautiful feet (something I'd been waiting all flipping month for!). In hindsight I really wish I had been wearing the stupendously brilliant Oxballs Cocksling... but alas I wasn't.
The only time I got properly hard was when she had me suck and clean her dildo after she had been using it on herself and teased me about it. As I said in my notes, this never seems to fail to get a reaction, and today was no excpeption. Unfortunately, if the ball splitter thing isn't on properly it kind of acts a bit like a chastity belt and you tend to swell up behind it and push it forward. The problem is, when your cock deflates it then simply drops off the end. This is not nearly as cool as wearing a rubber cock ring and having it split open because you are so hard that it can't take the strain (which has happened a few times in our sessions).
(Oh yes, before I forget, Mistress didn't forget about the towel incident, she dished out eleven smacks with the paddle at the start of the session... Ouch!)
Mistress had me remove the rest of the cock ring and secured me to the bed on my back. She stroked and slapped my cock but it still wasn't anywhere near as hard as either of us would have liked it. She mounted my face and had me lick her pussy (which helped quite a bit) and told me she needed my cock much harder so she could use it properly. She turned around and started teasing me with her ass (which always gets results) and then she whipped my cock with her little cock whip. Mmm, I must admit I do like having my cock whipped...
Then Mistress decided to push a small dildo into my ass, which was nice. But then she decided that since it had gone in so easy she needed to replace it with my (rarely used) buttplug. Unfortunately, experience tells me that it is almost impossible to insert when I'm lying on my back with my legs tied at the foot of the bed and I told her it would be better if I was on all fours. Mistress didn't want to untie me though and after some more unsuccessful pushing decided instead to insert my glass butt plug, which is like four balls with a ring on the top.
This felt really nice, much better than the normal dildo and Mistress made it even better by teasing me about having a real cock up my ass as she stroked the dildo in and out, allowing the ridges to really stimulate my ass. Then she stood over me and removed her PVC skirt before attaching clothes pegs to my nipples and leaving me alone for a while.
When she returned she removed the pegs, a little smile playing around her lips as I winced with the brief flash of pain when each was released. Then she sank down onto my face and I licked her pussy greedily, she was so ready and within seconds she had released me from the bed and had me down between her spread legs.
Mistress looked incredible with her leather corset top on and nothing else except her key pendant that she wears for every session these days. I was sooooooooooo happy to be going down on her and really, finally starting to relax into the session, which I had rather struggled to do so far. The real turning point was the huge orgasm that Mistress enjoyed a little while later, it was just wonderful to witness her cumming so hard. I would trade ten of my orgasms to make her cum like that every time. She looked so beautiful in the afterglow and after a few moments allowed me to gently lick her pussy clean.
Now Mistress stood up and bent over in front of me, before telling me to lick all the pussy juices off her skin. I gladly licked them all up before licking first my fingers and then the PVC sheet clean and then Mistress tied me down on my back again. Now she started teasing me about how much I love her ass and how much I would love to get my cock inside her ass. She wondered aloud what I would be willing to trade for the chance to fuck her there while she stroked my cock. Thankfully my cock had finally decided that it was ready to join in properly and was rock hard. Mistress allowed me four or five brief periods of ass worship as she stroked me hard. Mistress knows how much I love tonguing her gorgeous asshole and this really was absolutely delicious!
I never really thought that she was going to let me cum today, and indeed Mistress told me that she thinks she has been far too generous of late. I agree, it's been a year since I went 42 days and I haven't been anywhere near that in the meantime, so I'm hoping that this will signal a long period of denial for me in the near future.
Mistress knelt beside me and stroked my cock a few times more before giving my balls a nice slap to signal the end of the session. I couldn't believe it was over, it seemed like five minutes not an hour. Thankfully Mistress agreed and suggested that we might have a mini-session between now and our next scheduled session. I'm looking forward to that already! And to hopefully breaking Mistress R's record before the end of the week. :)

A great (but slightly difficult) question...

Had an interesting question by email this morning, asking 'Does your lifestyle make you feel less secure in your marriage?'

Wow, what a difficult question... I've just written two or three hundred words or so and deleted them because I'm not sure about my answer. The truth is, on one hand the increase in intimacy and trust one needs to place in one's partner when opening yourself up to this kind of lifestyle forms a stronger bond than most vanilla couples can hope to achieve. Mistress R and I have always been extremely close, but surrendering my orgasms to her full-time has made us even closer.
On the other hand, as my recent post will confirm, sometimes it's all too easy to get yourself in a pickle worrying about things. These concerns are difficult to ignore, especially when people ask you questions about things like how your wife views you since you became her 'chastity slave' etc, etc...
As I posted recently, it's not always so easy to completely forget the programming we are subjected to growing up (particularly about how the strong, dominant male is most attractive to the female) and sometimes it boils to the surface and leaves me feeling somewhat insecure.

Insecurities (part two)...

So I'm sure my earlier post probably left some of you scratching your heads a bit since my point was somewhat badly related. It comes back to something which has troubled me in the past and which I don't spend too much time thinking about these days, but which reared it's head again following last night's events. That being, as men we are brought up to believe that to fulfil a woman sexually we must be powerful, dominant, somewhat aggressive even. Women want to be fucked for hours and left spent...
We may bat this aside, dismiss it as nonsense... but even the most enlightened man can still fall into the trap of doubting himself.
Just look at the whole cuckold fantasy thing (fantasy probably being the operative word of course), the bull is the one who fucks her all night and leaves her exhausted while the inferior cuckold husband jerks off (assuming he's not locked in chastity of course). The male instinct is to compete with other men, to be perceived as sexually superior, and this does not sit well with most of us in the real world.
Imagine then, the man who gets to live his sexually submissive fantasy life... (that's me, okay) ...who surrenders his 'right' to orgasm, to penetrative sex, to even touch his own cock without permission. How does he reconcile this with years of programming, telling him that a real man, the man all women really want to be with is the powerful, dominant, sexually aggressive Alpha Male? Is it any wonder that doubts creep in now and again?
Mistress read my earlier post and asked me if I was worried. She yet again reassured me that she does not feel this way, that she feels that she has absolutely the best of all worlds, that she can have exactly what she wants when she wants it (and doesn't have to endure 'macho male pussy pounding' (my words, not hers) when she doesn't want it at all).
She said that just as we men are conditioned to believe that we must be 'Alpha Males', women are brought up to believe that all men are only interested in their own pleasure, that they just want to get on top, fuck until they cum and then go to sleep. This, as I'm sure the people who read my blog know, is not the case, and so it follows that our own conditioning is somewhat wide of the mark also.
Mistress R further said that, truth be told, if you got a group of women together and asked them straight-up, with no bullshit, what they actually want in bed, an awful lot of them would be a lot more interested in oral and non-penetrative stimulation than being 'fucked to exhaustion', despite media insistence to the contrary.
As I said, this doesn't worry me as much as it used to, but I still get doubts occasionally. I can see, logically, that Mistress R is right, she can take whatever she wants from me, whenever she wants it, sometimes that is penetrative sex, but most often it isn't... I guess it's just hard to shake off those years of conditioning which persuade us that we 'know' what women want, when we probably don't at all.
Men who enter this kind of lifestyle will doubtless encounter problems along the way and need reassurance from their partner from time to time, because to live this way is to go against what society has convinced us it means to be 'a man'. It's a shame that society doesn't teach us that to be a real man one should ensure that our partner's needs are properly taken care of, that we should seek to make them feel loved above all else and that their orgasm is of far greater importance than our own.
To live this way is not always easy, but the rewards are beyond anything I could ever hope for from a purely vanilla relationship and I sincerely hope I will never again be in one of those.

Is it really only ten days...

I can still taste Mistress R's beautiful pussy as I'm typing this, I wish this taste was permanently in my mouth I really do, I love it more than anything. Mmmmmmm....
So Mistress and I have just got out of bed again, where I licked her beautiful pussy until she came on my tongue. Then she teased, slapped and sucked my cock until it was nice and hard, before straddling me and sinking down onto my cock. Oh, but first she made me beg her to take her bra off... it's so frustrating how she wears her bra to bed simply because she knows I want her to take it off, but that's all part of the game I suppose, and I'm quite happy to beg for such a beautiful reward.
Mistress peeled her bra off to reveal her wonderful breasts and hard, pink nipples. Mmmmmmmmm, so fucking gorgeous!
Soon she was riding my cock and reaching back to drag her nails across my balls, then leaning forward to let me suck on her glorious nipples... then when she'd had enough she settled down beside me and started teasing my throbbing, aching cock with her hand. I love the look Mistress gets on her face when she's doing this, it's hard to describe... aloof, superior, dominant... I LOVE IT.
Mistress called a halt and I begged her to let me taste her pussy one more time, she smiled to herself in that beautiful way she does when she senses my desperation, then straddled my face and allowed me ten or fifteen seconds to worship her beautiful pussy before she climbed off and finally called a halt.
I can't believe it's only been ten days since I was allowed to cum properly, albeit Mistress ruined my last orgasm a few days ago*... it feels so much longer. Of course part of me wants to be allowed to cum, but as always the other part of me wants to be denied and/or ruined for weeks on end until I'm truly, truly desperate.

*I love that I can say that now, it seems like I've been waiting forever for that to become part of this amazing, wonderful experience.