Idiot...

Well... I feel like a complete idiot. Now that the (self-inflicted) stress of the last few days is over, it's suddenly dawned on me what a complete fool I've been... because somehow my brain has contrived to literally create a problem out of absolutely nothing. Indeed, my brain has somehow literally dragged up an old problem that has long since been largely resolved and brought it all back up again, and my head was so busy stressing and worrying that it seemingly didn't quite have the awareness to say, hang on a minute, what the fuck are you going on about?
Because, despite my complete stress-out, it suddenly occurred to me just today that actually, the last time we had sex with me on top there was no problem. True, I DID have a massive cramp when I came, but I wasn't losing my erection even though I wasn't wearing my cock ring. Indeed I'm struggling to think when the last time was that I did have a problem... and suddenly all my stressing out over the weekend seems completely groundless, no wonder Mistress R was completely bewildered.
All I've really done is dragged up an old problem and made it a problem again, by thinking about it. I mean once I was in that state it was inevitable that it wasn't going to work, wasn't it. What a fucking idiot. I am so annoyed with myself... talk about sabotaging yourself.
And now of course, it's going to play on both our minds, me because I will worry that it won't work next time and Mistress R because she'll be thinking exactly the same thing.
On a more positive note, Mistress R has just enjoyed a great orgasm and is even now drifting off to sleep. She's very tired and I will have to wait for my teasing, but I really don't mind at all, I absolutely loved making her cum tonight, just as I always do.