It may seem a little odd to you dear reader, but last night marked another first in Mistress and I’s growing relationship. It was the first time I asked Mistress if I could touch my cock when we weren’t in the bedroom. I know that doesn’t really sound like that big a deal, and I would understand if you felt that after three years plus in chastity any notions of nervousness or apprehension should be a thing of the past, but truthfully, despite many times when I’ve wanted to ask, somehow I just never have. And once one hesitates and the moment is lost, well…
See I’ve always thought that if I am asking to be allowed to touch my cock, then I should be desperate to do so, and as such I should be hard before even asking. There have been times when I have gone to bed before Mistress and either read something or thought about something which has made me hard and really wanted to go downstairs and ask Mistress for permission, but never quite had the balls (if you’ll excuse the pun). I don’t really know why that is, but I guess it’s just being nervous of putting myself in that position, again I don’t really know why, but anyway…
Last night I was kissing Mistress’s beautiful feet and I felt my cock getting really hard inside my shorts, and I thought this time I’m going to ask. So I did, and Mistress granted me permission. It was extremely brief, as it always seems to be when Mistress allows me to touch my cock, but as I knelt on the floor next to Mistress and kissed her as I stroked my cock Mistress groaned a little into my mouth and made it so memorable.
Hopefully, like most things, once you do them once it becomes easier to do them again, and to move forward. As I keep reminding myself, it’s not really fair to always expect Mistress to push things forward if I’m not prepared to make some effort myself. So hopefully this will be the start of another little piece of the puzzle falling into place, and maybe as this gets more ‘normal’ Mistress will allow me to stroke a little longer and maybe even have me edge myself for her.
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