As you probably know, since I posted about it not more than a couple of days ago, my last orgasm was kind of ruined but not ruined enough to be classed as a ruined orgasm. There was a definite refractory period that you don't get with a proper ruined orgasm, and yet... four days on and this evening I was surprisingly desperate to cum. Granted there were some mitigating factors, for example, having lost three pounds this week (total to date: 33.5lbs) and losing half a pound of new weight I was permitted to choose a treat.
Despite having been allowed the same treat a few days ago, but not at my choosing, it didn't take much thinking about to request being allowed to tongue Mistress R's gorgeous asshole again, so that will have increased the pressure for sure. And Mistress's exceptionally frustrating hand job certainly helped too of course... but I still think that semi-ruined orgasm was maybe more ruined than I thought. A stealth ruined orgasm if you will, since despite the definite but rather less pleasurable than it should have been climax, and the ensuing refractory period, it seems almost as if I was granted no relief whatsoever.
Perhaps Mistress R is better at this than she gives herself credit for? Because by the end of tonight's teasing I was humping the air in frustration, and feeling truly desperate to cum, far more desperate than a man who's only carrying a four day load should be at any rate. Needless to say, Mistress R enjoyed a lovely orgasm on my tongue all the same, taking her to a grand total of 340 since records began.
Still, thanks to Mistress Marie, there could be some possible relief on the horizon, Mistress R rather liked her suggestion that to get over her worries about ruining orgasms she should sometimes offer me the choice of whether to be ruined or left completely denied. Though whether that will actually offer any relief or whether it will just lead to more frustration is up for debate. Not that I'm complaining of course. Granted when I was humping the air and Mistress R's fingertips earlier this evening I was going crazy and wishing that I was just allowed to beg to be allowed to cum, at least then I would have some chance... maybe she would offer me some kind of deal or something? Probably not of course, but it would be nice to have that tiny sliver of hope.
Mind you, of course there's a part of me that much prefers to be kept denied, or wishes that Mistress R would ruin every orgasm she grants me, because as much as I desperately want to cum, I also want her to be mean to me and keep me in this state of constant frustration. I rather liked the comment left by an anonymous reader who suggested taking a week to repeatedly ruin me over and over so that Mistress could get used to doing it, in fact I liked that idea a lot!
Unfortunately, it's not for me to decide of course, Mistress R and Mistress R alone decides when, how and indeed if I am allowed to cum. And despite everything I may have written which suggests anything to the contrary, that's exactly how I like it. Sure I lay there fantasizing about exploding over just about every part of her gorgeous body, even though I know that anything other than cumming inside her or cumming by her hand is a rare treat indeed. I mean just check out my orgasm page, how long is it since I came in her mouth or on her feet? And how long was it since the last time?
But even tonight, even though I was riven with frustration, it was so hot that Mistress was unmoved, or more accurately I sensed it rather amused her to watch me writhe beneath her, so fucking desperate and so helpless to do anything about it. And that's why I'll probably wake up tomorrow morning, as I did this morning, with a rock hard, aching cock, leaking precum like there's no tomorrow. And I love it.
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