Wednesday, 10 April 2013

Ruined at last, and then...

It's nearly midnight, I'm tired and I should go to bed, but I have to write about what happened tonight. After being allowed to worship Mistress's beautiful pussy for the third time in four days (heaven!) and feeling her have a lovely orgasm as I licked her clit, I was somewhat reluctant to move from between her legs. I love looking at her pussy after Mistress has cum and I love to breathe in her scent because I know it will be hours, maybe even days until I get to luxuriate in it again...
But eventually I found myself on my back with my head on the pillow, kissing my beautiful Mistress as she started to stroke my cock to full hardness. I told her how much I love eating her pussy as she moved down the bed and started to suck my cock. Of course I was already wondering, will I get to cum... will this be my first ruined orgasm???
I told her how her pleasure was so much more important than mine, that her orgasms were all that mattered to me.
Mistress took her time, sucking, stroking, slapping... until my cock was rock hard, then she started stroking harder and faster and I warned her that I was getting close. She didn't stop... I felt myself getting closer still, too close!
I warned Mistress again and she almost immediately let go of my cock, just before a stream of cum oozed from the tip onto my stomach. The flow stopped immediately and Mistress watched as I frustratedly squeezed my cock muscles trying to force more cum out, trying to gain proper relief... and failed miserably.
Maybe fifteen, twenty seconds passed and Mistress gently curled her fingers around my cock, the edge had totally passed and my cock responded to her touch growing harder than ever. She stroked my cock quickly and asked me if I had any more cum left in my balls. I told her yes, and she told me she was allowing me to cum now.
Mistress stroked my cock hard and fast until I had a violent, amazing, intense orgasm that left me quite literally panting and soaked in cum. It was absolutely unbelievable how much cum was all over me...
Afterwards I asked if I was in trouble for cumming without permission, she said that she was one second from giving me permission anyway, so this time she would let me off. I asked her if she had intended to ruin it or had she just let go because I was close. She said she intended to ruin it.
I am so proud of my Mistress for taking this step. I know she has always been somewhat against the idea of doing this, because she thought it was too mean... I think, not sure. But recently she has seemingly changed her mind, maybe I have managed to persuade her that I love the idea of her being increasingly sexually 'mean' to me. I hope so... because I really do love it.
I feel like Mistress (and I of course) has taken a big step forward today, and that she won't be worried about doing it again. I love the thought that I will never again be able to take it for granted that permission to cum will result in a satisfying orgasm, now I will always be wondering if Mistress will take her hand away just as I start to cum and ruin my orgasm. The thought of her controlling my cock like that is so fucking hot. And of course when I do get to cum properly I will appreciate it even more!
This is what I always wanted, for Mistress to have control not only of 'when' and 'if' I cum, but also in what manner and how much pleasure I am allowed from it.
I am so happy right now.
I can't wait until I've been denied a really long time and Mistress holds this new power over me... now she could make me wait weeks then ruin an orgasm and then make me wait even longer, and then she could just do it again if that's what she decided.
I'm just so glad that Mistress didn't panic when I started to cum and finish me off, I am super impressed with that. I know it's not easy for her to understand why I would want this even, and I can understand that, for me it's as much a mental as a physical thing... I want her to have total control of my cock and this is such a big step towards that.
Like I said before, in the past I always stayed away from the edge during teasing because I didn't want it cut short and I didn't want to override Mistress's authority by cumming without permission. Now I feel like I can relax more and enjoy being edged because Mistress has the perfect tool to deal with it if I lose control.
It's taken a long time to get here, but it's been 100% worth it.

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